I ran five miles. Two and a half miles up the road, then two and a half miles back the same way. It was very boring. Therefore I have nothing to report. Although, the dead hedgehog is still there, in case you’re interested.
Stats:
Distance: 5.00 miles
Time: 57:35
Pace: 11:31 m/m
Calories: 517
Dead hedgehogs: 1
Music:
Audiofuel
Babybird
Because I’d planned to do four miles today, I didn’t really want to do my usual field route and tag on another mile so I thought I’d go to the fields past the churchyard that me and Shaun have walked over many times, if I could find them on my own.
So I ran down the hill to the beats of Audiofuel and went through the churchyard, feeling glad that Shaun didn’t buy the house overlooking the dead people and I find the gate that leads through to the level crossing
and there’s no trains coming from the right
or from the left
and then I’m on the slippery stones
but I manage not to fall over and then I’m on the bridge
and there’s water and everything
and then I have to go over a stile
and I manage to get over it all by myself and not fall over into the mud and in the field is a horse
and a little horse
and then there’s another stile
and another field
and another bridge
and I run round the field and when I get halfway round the field I think this is the field that me and Shaun came in before where we saw all the birds on the phone wire but we came from a different direction and now I’m confused and I think if I carry on going round, it’s not going to be four miles but I carry on going and then I’m back to the bridge and I go over the bridge and there’s a nice blue sky
which makes a change from the grey skies and wind and rain we seem to have had for ever and I get back to the field where the horses live and they’re even nearer than they were before
and the big horse comes to say hello or have you got anything more interesting than grass I can eat please?
but I haven’t got anything more interesting for him to eat than grass and I stop to stroke the horse but I’m a bit scared as I haven’t been in the same field as a horse for years and they’re usually on the other side of a fence and I wonder if countryside horses are fierce and bark a lot and I decide that no, that’s only countryside dogs that do that and I carry on running and the horse doesn’t start barking at me and I go past a stile and wonder if that’s the stile I came over but I think it’s far too near and I go to the end of the field and I see the bridge
and I think what’s the bridge doing over there? and so I go back the way I came and go over the stile and over the bridge and then I’m back on the slippery bit
and then I’m approaching the churchyard and there’s an old lady and a man going in and they hold the gate open for me and I say thank you and there’s people looking at graves in the churchyard and I don’t want to run through the churchyard when there’s people in there and so I walk through the dead people and I look over to my right and I see the village and I think what’s it doing over there? and I’ve gone a different way back and I’m round the corner from the bottom of the hill and I think I’ll have to run up the hill as I’ve done hardly any running on this run but I don’t even get as far as the bit where I usually get off my bike and push it but then I start running again and I get back to the house at 3.07 miles and I wonder if I’ve got another mile in me and I decide yes and so I carry on past the house and after half a mile I stop and turn round and go back and I get to the house at 3.96 miles and I think bloody hell, I’ll have to carry on going and I switch my Garmin off at 4 miles and turn back and on the house next door is a sign saying Happy Birthday, 70 today and I think no it isn’t and no I’m not and then I decide the sign probably wasn’t meant for me.
Stats:
Distance: 4.03 miles
Time: 55:09
Pace: 13:41 m/m
Calories: 345
Level crossings: 1
Trains: 0
Bridges: 2
Horses: 2
Little horses: 1
Barking horses: 0
Times gone past house: 2
Signs for 70 years olds: 1
Music:
Audiofuel
Drinking on a Sunday evening is something I like doing but whereas in London, getting up to go to work and getting paid for falling asleep and watching the clock tick round to 5:30 wasn’t a problem, drinking too much the night before when you work at home isn’t very conducive to productivity, especially when you can mess around on Facebook without fearing the sudden appearance of your boss over your shoulder.
So, the last two Sundays, I’ve gone without my bottle(s) of wine and therefore, the following morning, I’ve woken up fresh as a daisy, albeit a slightly wilted one, and actually got things done.
After I managed to run four miles on Saturday without stopping, I decided that this week I would do three, four and five miles; the three miler on the road, hopefully quicker than in a field, so this morning I got up at just before 7am with the plan to do three miles on the road but it’s still dark and I think, that doesn’t matter, I’m not planning on going anywhere for an hour anyway, but at 8 o’clock, it’s still dark and it’s raining and I don’t want to go on the road in the dark and the rain and I don’t want to go on the road at this time of day either as it’ll be full of school run mums who don’t know how to drive and so I decide to go over the field again and I put on my hi vis top and my trail shoes and go out into the wind and the rain and the cold and it’s not very eventful, just a couple of people with dogs and quite a few cars but luckily none of the school run mums run me over and I think how far away do they live that they have to drive their kids to school? as I don’t remember seeing loads of cars full of kids in London, just people walking their kids to school and I decide that countryside people are just lazy and that’s probably why countryside people look at me in shock when I tell them I don’t drive.
I do the 3 miles in a combination of walking and running but mostly running and I get back and I’m about a minute per mile quicker than I was on Saturday. Hurrah.
Stats:
Distance: 3.01 miles
Time: 34:50
Pace: 11:35 m/m
Calories: 311
Sunday bottles of wine: 0
Early mornings: 1
Still dark at 8 o’clocks: 1
People with dogs: 2
School run mums: lots
Lazy countryside people: all of them
Minutes per mile quicker: 1
Music:
The Cure
Foo Fighters
Oasis
I did run on Thursday. I was going to round up my 2.94 mile route to 3 miles but when I got to 3 miles, I thought I might as well round it up to 5k and so I did but then when I got home, I was checking the Open University website for the millionth time that day to see if my TMA had been returned as it was six days late and lo! it was there. And not only was it there but it said I got 80%. Woo hoo. So then I was too excited to blog and spent the rest of the day gloating on Facebook and Twitter and forgetting to look up humility in the dictionary.
And after celebrating by drinking lots of wine that evening, yesterday I was too tired to go to London for the Cardiacs meet up and so I stayed in and this morning I went out for 4 miles and I had planned to go through the field, then up the steep bit, then along the road until I got to two miles but the steep bit had been gated off and I didn’t know if I was allowed to climb over the gate and what if there were big barking fierce countryside dogs in there? and so I went through the other field and up the road for two miles and then turned round and came back and I got home and I’d done the longest run I’ve done for months and so that means that this week I’ve run 10 miles which is the most I’ve done for months and months and months, although I have got really really slow. And I mean proper slow.
Stats:
Distance: 4.06 miles
Time: 51:16
Pace: 12:37 m/m
Calories: 375
80%s: 1
Cardiacs meet ups gone to: 0
Gates blocking steep bits: 1
Really really proper slow runners: 1
Music:
The Cure
Nine Inch Nails
The The
I was in the library yesterday picking up a copy of The Enchantress of Florence by Salman Rushdie
I did a Santa fun run last year in Dagenham where we got a santa suit and a medal and I’m pretty sure that was only about £7 for a 5k race. Far better value.
I thought I’d do two miles today and then I thought I’d do three and walk the last one if I have to as it’s time on feet that counts isn’t it? and then I thought oh no, I’ll be going over the field and I haven’t got my trail shoes on, only my normal ones and I think oh well, and I get down the road and there’s an old lady walking down the road towards me and she’s shielding her eyes and I think oh, it must be sunny that way then unless she’s shielding her eyes for no reason at all and I get to the field and I go round the corner and it’s all muddy and I think well, I could do with getting my shoes dirty as they’re almost as clean as when I first got them a year ago and I get to the next field and there’s a dog running around and I’m wondering if it’s a friendly dog and I decide it is and the friendly dog goes over with a stick in its mouth to its owner and then it sees me and thinks oooh, a new friend to throw my stick for me and it comes over with its stick and I stop and pat it on the head and say hello doggy and I look round for its owner and the man is smiling and he’s on the phone and he calls the dog and the dog’s called Molly and Molly goes over to him but then Molly comes back to me and I stop again and tell Molly to go back to her owner and the man ends his phone call and calls Molly over and she goes back to him and then back to me again and I think bloody hell, this could go on all day and I decide to just carry on running and hope Molly doesn’t follow me and why don’t these countryside people have any control over their dogs like they do in London? and then I’m back on the road and inspiration strikes for the second assignment for my OU course and I think hurrah, I know what I want to write but I think it might be a bit over-ambitious and I haven’t even got my results for the first assignment yet which are now four days overdue and I need to know if I should just give up now or carry on and then I’m back on the main road and there’s a Tesco van and I keep seeing Tesco vans round here and why don’t people go to Sainsbury as we’ve only been going to Tesco the last four weeks as they gave us four £10 off shopping over £30 vouchers but usually we go to Sainsbury as Shaun doesn’t like the type of people who shop in Tesco although soon Tesco will be half a mile away instead of 14 miles away and there’s a man getting in a car and he’s smiling at me or saying something but I can’t tell because the sun’s in my eyes and the old lady wasn’t shielding her eyes for no reason after all and I get home and Dermot the dog next door is barking and therefore not dead and I’m looking forward to lunchtime so I can have some more of the nicest soup in the world ever.
Stats:
Distance: 2.94 miles
Time: 34:11
Pace: 11:38 m/m
Calories: 304
Old ladies shielding their eyes: 1
Dogs called Molly: 1
Inspiration strikes: 1
Assignment results overdue: 1
Tesco vans: 1
Not dead Dermots: 1
Nicest soups in the world evers: 1
Music:
PJ Harvey
Muse
The Wombats
The Cure
Lush
I did do a little run on Saturday. A measly, pathetic 2.21 miles, half of which was walked. Although, looking at the splits now, I did the first mile in 10:15 which is practically a sprint for me at the mo, so that would be why I gave up on the second mile. That and the fact that the camber was hurting my left thigh and giving me cramp in my right foot.
So this morning I decided to do another measly, pathetic 2 miles but to avoid the camber and just go to the tree and back. Very boring.
As it’s a usual damp, cold and misty countryside morning, I put on my hi vis long sleeve top that is usually only pulled out of the drawer for cold dark evening running commutes as I end up roasting in it but as anyone on my Facebook can attest, heat is a dim and distant memory and I need to wrap up warm.
I get outside and BLOODY HELL, IT’S FREEZING and I wonder where my gloves are and I think they’re probably in the box under the stairs and I think I hardly ever wore gloves in London and the countryside is cold and stupid and after about 1.5 miles I finally get the feeling back in my hands and I can see someone running down the road towards me and I think ANOTHER RUNNER, WOO HOO but then I see it’s someone delivering things but he’s only wearing shorts and a t-shirt so I wonder if he’s combining delivering things with keeping fit and he gets closer and I see it’s a postman and I think I’ve never seen a running postie before.
Stats:
Distance: 2.19 miles
Time: 23:57
Pace: 10:55 m/m
Calories: 227
Heat: 0
Running posties: 1
Music:
Nine Inch Nails
Radiohead
I had thought I’d given up running, seeing as I don’t really do it anymore but I thought I’d give it another go, especially as I’ve got a proper wobbly belly now – one of those ones that you can lift up and let go and it flops and everything – and am in danger of turning into a proper fat person. And although I had given up running, I did run to Oxford Circus tube on Tuesday night, then ran down the escalator, ran along the platform and jumped on the tube to travel two stops to Charing Cross, where I ran along the platform, ran up the escalator, ran across the foyer and over the barrier just in time to catch the last train home. And apart from the hangover yesterday, I didn’t ache after my little Central London sprint until this morning when my legs felt like they’d done some exercise after not having done any for ages. Probably because they hadn’t. Still, I decided to go out for two miles this morning and as I was putting my shoes on and waiting for my Garmin to get a signal the phone rang. I made a rare occurrence of answering the annoying ringing thing and it was the same old lady who rang last week with the wrong number and asked me if I was going shopping tomorrow. Last week I shouted at her “YOU’VE GOT THE WRONG NUMBER” and felt bad when I put the phone down so today when she rang and asked me if I was going shopping tomorrow I politely told her she had the wrong number. She said “oh, have I got your wrong number again” and I said “yes, you have.” So then she said “are you going shopping tomorrow?” at which point I lost my patience again and shouted at her “NO, YOU’VE GOT THE WRONG NUMBER” although maybe I should have said “yes, of course I’m going shopping tomorrow, you promised to buy me that pink Samsung NC10 netbook, remember?” and then maybe I could have got a freebie.
So after putting the phone down to old ladies who keep ringing me to ask if I’m going shopping tomorrow, I go out for my two mile run and instead of going to the tree and back, I decide to start off down the hill and go past the library and do a two mile round route. And so I do my two mile round route but it’s not very exciting really and not very comfortable on account of the steep camber although I did see the dead hedgehog and wondered just how long that dead hedgehog is going to be there for, maybe until it decomposes? and someone in a car beeped and stuck out his middle finger which I didn’t find very charming and that was about it really and then I went home and had hot chocolate and my new favourite 11 o’clock food: crumpets.
Yum.
Stats:
Distance: 2.13 miles
Time: 24:50
Pace: 11:38 m/m
Calories: 221
Old ladies ringing me to ask if I’m going shopping: 1
Libraries: 1
Dead hedgehogs: 1
People sticking their middle finger up at me: 1
Crumpets: 2
Music:
Nine Inch Nails
Oasis
Foo Fighters
The Cure
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