JogBlog running blog

This will probably be my last post of 2009.  It’ll also be my last post where the thing above where it says ‘Rants and raves from a 30-something female runner’ will be true.

That’s right, I’m having a sex change.

So, tomorrow we’re off to Italy to celebrate my sex change and back on Christmas Eve.  I’m not planning on running on Christmas Day although I seem to remember Mr Iliketocount dragging me out last Christmas Day for three miles round the marshes but that was back in the old days when we were just dating and I was pretending to like him.  Now I don’t have to pretend anymore, I think I’ll stay in bed.

I might run between Christmas and New Year, but if not, I’d like to wish you all a very Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year, whatever you’re doing or not doing.

Merry Christmas everyone!

I am planning on sitting in front of the telly tonight drinking wine, and because that isn’t very conducive to getting up early and going for a run the next day, I thought I’d go for a run today instead.  When I got up, however, I didn’t feel like it but decided to force myself out the door for three miles.  On getting to the bottom of the hill, like the slacker I am, I decide that I’m only going to do two.  I get past the library and I see the van that belongs to the plumber across the road coming down the road and I think no it’s not, the plumber’s in London and I’m not in London and anyway, he moved away before I did and it’s just a London-based hallucination and I go round the corner and in the distance there’s a kid bouncing around in a hi-vis jacket and I think that’s weird, countryside people don’t usually walk with their kids, they usually drive them everywhere and then I realise it’s not a kid in a hi-vis jacket but a dog in a hi-vis jacket and the woman is pushing a pram or a buggy or whatever they’re called but it’s got it transparent plastic rain hood thing over it and so I can’t see whether there’s a baby in there or just lots of cans of Special Brew and I get to the tree and I’ve got a strange pain in the back of my head on the right hand side and it’s also making my right eyeball hurt but I’m a brave little soldier and I carry on and as I get up to the main road, the road’s covered with water and it’s like a little lake and I don’t want to get my feet wet but it’s not very deep and I only squelch a little bit and then I’m on the main road and I decide to walk the last half mile and then my next door neighbour walks past and I think no, that’s not my next door neighbour, she’s in London and I must stop having these London-based hallucinations.

Stats:
Distance: 2.14 miles
Time: 24:45
Pace: 11:32 m/m
Calories: 222 
Sitting in front of the tellies drinking wine planned: 1 
Three mile runs turned into two mile runs: 1
Dogs in hi-vis jackets: 1
Buggies possibly full of Special Brew: 1
London-based hallucinations: 2
Music:
Audiofuel
Babybird
Mansun
Cardiacs

Yesterday I had planned to go for a run but as it was dark until lunchtime, I went off the idea at around 11am and opted to stay in and drink hot chocolate and eat crumpets instead.

Today I was less of a slacker and although my pc weather widget thing said it was only 1C, at least there was daylight outside and so I decided to do three miles on the road to see if I can improve on my time of 12:30 minute miles that I do when I run on the fields.

My run starts off downhill as I, um, run down a hill and it’s not long before I run out of pavement and a car comes down the road fast and she must be a driving-back-from-the-school-run-mum and then the slowest car in the world comes along and I wonder if there’s a five year old pushing it from behind but no, it’s just a stupid countryside person looking down while trying to light a cigarette and I go past the egg house and I think I should have brought the egg box back and then I think no I shouldn’t as it’s the wrong egg house and their eggs are only £1 unlike the egg house we’ve bought eggs from the last two weeks who charge £1.40 and although the week before last I only had £1.50 on me, Shaun wouldn’t let me only give them £1.30 this week, even though they owe me 10p and then I go round the corner and I get a stone caught in the sole of my shoe and I need a hoof pick or something and then coincidentally I can smell horses and I think I must be imagining it because I thought of a hoof pick but then I see a HUGE pile of manure and think aah, I’m not hallucinating horsey smells then but I still can’t get this stone out of my shoe and I stop to look at the sole and I can’t even see a stone but it’s uncomfortable and I feel like Princess and the Pea or something and I scrape my foot along the ground but it’s still there and then I think it must be the seam of my sock or something and I go past a field with horses in and one of the horses is looking over the fence and I want to stop and stroke it but I don’t because I’m a finely tuned athlete aren’t I? and then I go past the place where the horrible little schoolboy shot me with a staple gun and then I’m back on the pavement and I go past a house and a stupid countryside dog starts barking and I jump and I can’t even see the stupid barking countryside dog and then I see it and it’s a stupid little thing, although quite stocky and I think I’m never getting a dog while I live in the countryside as it will be a stupid barking one and then I get to the bottom of the hill and I’ve done three miles so I stop my Garmin and walk up the hill.

Stats:
Distance: 3.15 miles
Time: 35:13
Pace: 11:10 m/m
Calories: 326
Degrees in Celsius: 1
Sunlights: 1
Downhill: 1
Fast cars: 1
Slow cars: 1
Egg houses: 1
Stones in shoes: 0
Princess and the Pea moments: 1
Stupid barking countryside dogs: 1
Uphills: 1
Music:
Audiofuel
Babybird
Mansun