The JogBlog guide to not looking like a New Year Newbie

It’s that time of year every seasoned gym-goer dreads. The time of year when there are two questions whizzing round their heads:

1. Will the newbies be hogging all the machines; and

2. Will everyone think I’m a newbie too?

This morning, I had planned to go to the gym and these were the questions I had in my head so, upon opening my kit drawer, I pulled out an old pair of running tights and grabbed a t-shirt but eek, the t-shirt was a salmony-pink colour and nothing screams NEWBIE as much as pink does.

Then there was the shoe dilemma. I have two pairs of running shoes that I haven’t even tried on yet, let alone wear, but – like pink – new shoes are a no no if you don’t want to be mistaken for a newbie so I put on the purple pair I’ve recently been wearing to the gym and they even had a bit of mud on them. Result.

And yes, I know we all had to start somewhere, so I’m not really mocking (although a bit of ‘spot the newbie’ fun in the gym does help to pass the time), especially as my newbie runner kit seven years ago consisted of thick baggy tracksuit bottoms, a cotton t-shirt, a heavy hooded fleece, two normal bras worn at the same time and a pair of trainers that cost me £10 from Shoe Zone.

I needn’t have worried though, there were no newbies in the gym, just the three ‘older’ people who are usually there in the morning and I did my usual rowing machine/cross-trainer/treadmill combo without having to wait for newbies to stop hogging the machines.

Stats
Pairs of old running tights: 1
Salmony-pink t-shirts: 1
Pairs of purple trainers with a bit of mud on them: 1
Newbies in the gym: 0
Rowing machine: 20 minutes
Cross-trainer: 20 minutes
Treadmill: 20 minutes
Music
Courtney Love – Sunset Strip
Duran Duran – Electric Barberella
David Holmes – I Heard Wonders
The Black Keys – Lonely Boy
Soft Cell – Sex Dwarf
Calvin Harris – Feel So Close
Ghostpoet – I Just Don’t Know
Knifeworld – In A Foreign Way
U2 – Vertigo
Eugene McGuinness – Shotgun
The Polyphonic Spree – Running Away
The Secret Machines – Lightning Blue Eyes

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Comments: 13

  1. Anne January 3, 2013 at 11:50 am Reply

    I also find that it’s good to get to know a couple of the people who work at the gym, so you can strut in and look like a regular. Great for the ego, and every little bit helps! :)

  2. Lucy January 3, 2013 at 12:13 pm Reply

    I’m so glad to see this post because I was going through the exact same thought process yesterday! I’m a bit sheepish because I’ve just switched gyms after 2 years at the old one, and I got new running shoes for Christmas that I’m trying to break in. So lo and behold, I rocked up at the new gym yesterday looking like the biggest newbie ever. Must go and find some mud ASAP!

  3. Claire Kelly January 3, 2013 at 1:24 pm Reply

    I am the exact same!! Last week though I bought a few new tops to refresh my running wardrobe when I am back running after having baby… and I bought bright pink… I know I wont be wearing any of the new stuff until I am back running like I was before getting pregnant… Its going to be hard enough taking it easy and running at a snais pace, without doing it in the bright pink…. maybe I should jsut wear ALL my marathon medals to prove a point…. or is that going too far ?? :) C x

  4. Hils January 3, 2013 at 1:54 pm Reply

    thanks to my hubby he’s converted the garadge into a makeshift gym with an old well used punch bag, speed ball, weights of all sizes and an interesting version of a kettle bell?!?! and a pull up bar ….can’t work out the music system though but I can wear any old rags in there ….and I do LOL!! x

  5. Runorgocrazy January 3, 2013 at 8:51 pm Reply

    Oh no I looked like a newbie this morning!?

  6. Nici January 3, 2013 at 9:23 pm Reply

    Loving the playlist!

  7. Caryn January 3, 2013 at 10:52 pm Reply

    I spotted the newbies in my gym last night, too. One of them was walking around barefoot!

  8. Tracey January 5, 2013 at 1:29 pm Reply

    What’s wrong with being new? You were, once.

    • JogBlog January 5, 2013 at 1:31 pm Reply

      Nothing wrong with being a newbie! Hence the paragraph:

      “And yes, I know we all had to start somewhere, so I’m not really mocking (although a bit of ‘spot the newbie’ fun in the gym does help to pass the time), especially as my newbie runner kit seven years ago consisted of thick baggy tracksuit bottoms, a cotton t-shirt, a heavy hooded fleece, two normal bras worn at the same time and a pair of trainers that cost me £10 from Shoe Zone.”

  9. Tracey January 5, 2013 at 3:33 pm Reply

    Why do you “dread” being mistaken for one then? Who cares?

    • JogBlog January 5, 2013 at 3:39 pm Reply

      Would you like some Prozac?

  10. Tracey January 5, 2013 at 3:43 pm Reply

    No, you keep it, it might make you less judgmental.

    • runningman856 January 8, 2013 at 5:50 pm Reply

      It’s called ‘Humour’ Tracey. Try it, it’s good for you!

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