Juneathon 2014 – Day 2 – Bald Sheep

After yesterday’s pathetic effort, I knew I had to redeem myself today so I went for a walk. Okay, so a walk isn’t exactly extreme effort but if it hadn’t have been for Juneathon, I wouldn’t have bothered and that’s one of the points of Juneathon, really.

To make it more interesting though, I thought I’d get some photos of the lambs in the field a few doors away. Unfortunately, they were far away and I could only get a crap photo.


Then I saw some cows but they were hiding behind the hedge.


I did get a photo of a bald sheep though.


Tomorrow, I’ll go for a run. Promise.

Juneathon Day 2

Walk: 1.5 miles
Lambs: far away
Sheep: bald
Cows: hiding in a hedge

Cows, calves and cats up trees

Yesterday’s bike ride wore me out so much, I fell asleep last night before I could get drunk. So today’s hangover, on a scale of 0-10 of Sunday hangovers, was only about 2, so I went to the gym this morning.


Then iliketocount and I went for a bike ride to explore the next bit of the Greensand Way that we hadn’t seen yet (well, I say ‘we’, I mean ‘me’, as he’d gone and explored it without me a few weeks ago).


I saw a cat up a tree


and a cow with a big spiky metal thing in its nose (anyone know what it’s for?)


and a baby cow


and some cows roaming free on the footpath that I was too scared of to go anywhere near.


And then we went to the pub for a pint and cycled back.

That’s enough greenery for one weekend, I’m going to go and look at a picture of Canary Wharf or something.

Rowing machine: 20 minutes
Cross-trainer: 20 minutes
Cycling: 6 miles
Walking: 1.5 miles
Cats in trees: 1
Cows with bit metal spiky things in its nose: 1
Baby cows: lots
Pints: 1

I’ve got a favour to ask…

See this cow?


Cute, isn’t it?

It’s soooooooooooooo cute, I’ve entered it into a ‘Cute Cow’ competition and what I’d like/need/really really really really would love you to do for me is to vote for it so I win the competition and get given lots of money.

If I win, I’ll spend £100 of the prize money on a giveaway on my blog.

You can vote for my cow here: http://cowoftheyear.com/view_the_contstants/cathy-white-3/# (you can vote once every day).

Please vote for my cow!

Moo to the Beat

I get a lot of emails from charities, asking me to promote their event or campaign. I mostly ignore these (unless they’re from Cancer Research UK or other vivisection-funding charities, who get an email telling them why I won’t support them) but last week I got an email from Rebecca Moore from the World Society of the Protection of Animals and included in her email was a picture of a cow

which obviously automatically made her my New Best Friend (unless she’s the Rebecca Moore who was mean to me at school, but she assured me she isn’t).

The WSPA are currently running a campaign called Not in my Cuppa trying to stop the introduction of US style mega dairies into the UK (where cows would spend the majority of their life indoors in very unpleasant conditions).

They’re looking for people to take part in Run to the Beat for them. Unfortunately, I’m doing Folkestone Half that day but if you want to do the race and want a worthy cause to run for, what better than cows?

(Posted also on Planet Veggie)

Speeding along at 27mph

Up bright and early today as I’ve got a busy day ahead, first going down to Maidstone Library to have a chat about being a volunteer computer buddy, then off to London (hurrah) to see a man about a website, then I’m meeting a friend for drinks and dinner and because I promised I was sticking to my schedule this time, I don’t wimp out of my scheduled two mile run and weights session, especially as when I get on the scales I want to throw them out of the window, because surely they can’t be right?  Can anyone recommend some decent bathroom scales?  I’ve got my eye on these ones, although if I get on them and they show the weight they’re showing on the picture, they’ll be following the cheapy ones out of the window.

I look out of the window and there’s some men in hi-vis jackets by the bus stop and I don’t want to run past them and I wonder if they’re waiting for a bus but I haven’t got all day to hang around here and so I’m brave and go outside and one of them’s sitting down on a chair so I don’t think they’re waiting for a bus and as I pass them they say morning and I’m confused as workmen usually say awright darlin’ or something and I say morning back even though I am confused and I start to run and I feel lighter despite what my bathroom scales say and I wonder if it’s because I’ve had about six inches cut off my hair and I decide my scales are lying as I haven’t been drinking that much or eating any crisps or chocolate except for the few white chocolate buttons that came in my free graze box (if you want one go to www.graze.com and enter the code HQTGF3G) and I get to the new cows on the corner and a fly flies into my eye and a cow runs along the field next to me and I’ve never seen a cow run before and I get to the tree and come back as I’m only doing two miles today and as I get back to the road there’s a sign saying they’re doing speed tests or something and that’ll be why the men are there and they’re still there at the bus stop and there’s a sign that tells me I’m doing 27mph and I think their sign is about as accurate as my bathroom scales.

Distance: 2.12 miles
Time: 22:52
Pace: 10:47 m/m
Calories: 188
Lying bathroom scales: 1
Inches off hair: 6
Free boxes of food: 1
Flies in my eye: 1
Cows running: 1
Signs saying I was doing 27mph: 1

Juneathon 2009 Days 28 and 29 – 17 miles, cows, sheep & sunshine

Saturday morning I spent being a WAG, and my feet hurt so much in my new boots even though I only had to walk from the car to the bench, it felt like I’d run 20 miles, so does that count for Juneathon? 

And on Sunday Shaun took me on a new route on the bikes and although we went past sheeps and cows, I didn’t take my camera with me so there’s no photographic evidence of my bovine based excursion.Road sign

But today, on the penultimate Juneathon, I thought I’d go back in search of cows, this time taking my camera, and hoping I don’t get lost.  I get to the bit where I think I’m supposed to turn off but there’s road signs and I don’t know what they mean and maybe they mean I can’t go down there (and I still don’t know what it means as the website I nicked the image off doesn’t say) and so I turn round and carry on going up the hill and I think no, I definitely needed to turn off where the road signs are but I decide to go a bit further to see what’s up the road but not much really so I turn round and go down the road I was supposed to go down in the first place and I get back to the village and decide not to go home yet but to cycle through the village and go a way I’ve only been in the car before and there’s a lot of traffic but I’m brave and don’t go on the pavement and then I’m on a quiet road again and there’s a road I remember Shaun saying something about that it’s a mile loop or something but I can’t remember what as I probably wasn’t listening as usual and I decide to carry on going straight ahead and little while later I get to the road I just passed and I think aah, I’ll go down there and go back that way then and I decide to stay out longer as I still haven’t seen any cows and sheep and I don’t know why as there were plenty of cows and sheep yesterday but my quest isn’t over yet and so I carry on going and I go past a field of blue flowers

Blue flowers

and I decide to go the way I went the other day that leads me out onto the main road and just as I get round the corner I SEE COWS!! 


Woo hoo.  And sheep.  Woo.


And one of the cows decides to demonstrate why they’re not very good at playing hide and seek

A not very well hidden cow

but then the cow comes out of its not very good hiding place and it’s the prettiest cow in the whole world

Unhidden cow

and it’s right up against the fence and I want to stroke its nose but I don’t know if cows bite or not and so I decide not to stroke the cow and I eventually tear myself away from the prettiest cow in the whole world and a bit further on I go past where we saw the ducks shagging in a most violent manner and there’s brown and white sheep

Brown and white sheep

but they’re a bit camera shy and run away

Brown and white sheep running away

except for one greedy fat bastard sheep who carries on eating

Sheep eating

and then I go down a steep hill I don’t remember going down before and I get to the main road and I decide to be brave and cycle down it to home and that’s today’s Juneathon done and as tomorrow is the last Juneathon for this year, I’m going to test out my new running watch and attempt a run and as Joggerblogger has entrusted me with the responsibility of choosing this year’s Juneathon Winner, you’d all better start getting your bribes in now.



Stats day 29 (cycling)
Distance: 17.30 miles
Time: 1:43:02
Speed: 10.1mph
Calories: 475
Fields of blue flowers: 1
Cows: some
Sheep: also some
Hills I don’t remember: 1
Pavements cycled on: 0
Days to get bribes to me: 2
Juneathon’s completed: 25/30

Road 1 Me 0

As yesterday’s run was more of a run a bit, take photos of sheep, run a bit more, take photos of lambs and run a bit, take photos of cows kind of run, today I decided to be a proper hardcore runner and go for a run without my camera and not stopping to look at the cute farmyard animals, especially as, since I cancelled my gym membership, either my scales are lying or I need to do more exercise.  And obviously eat less crisps (and somehow cakes have crept into the fridge) but one thing at a time, eh?

I spend most of the morning procrastinating as usual before putting my trainers on and I even excel in my usual procrastinations by wasting time looking for cat poo, as the cat and I moved in on Saturday and she hasn’t been in her litter tray yet but has weed on the rug which Shaun was really pleased with.  At least, I think he was, as he marched into the living room with a brush and a bucket full of disinfectant and I know how much he likes cleaning, so she did him a favour really.

As I put my Garmin outside to get a signal, the cat makes a break for freedom and I get her back in the house and she meows at me and I shut her in the house and run up the road and when I turn the corner I see some old people with dogs and an old lady says hello and I try not to make eye contact in case she has magical powers and turns me into a countryside person and I mumble hello and look at my feet and in a field is a bunny and I think aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah, cute bunny and then there’s a baby bunny and I think AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH, CUTE BABY BUNNY and he runs off and then there’s another baby bunny sitting with the lambs and I wonder if it’s the same bunny? and how come it’s scared of me and not scared of the lambs? and then I’m on the road with the corners and I get to the bend I didn’t like the most yesterday and I go further to the edge and my ankle ends up in a hole and the rest of me ends up in the road and I think ouch and I want to get up off the road before I get run over and I stand up and a tractor goes past and then three cars behind it and I take a few steps and my ankle’s not that bad and I carry on running and I think I’ve gone past where the cows live as I didn’t see any and didn’t see any fields I recognise as being the one they live in and I must have been too traumatised after falling over to notice them and I think that I’ll have to either a) give up running and get fat; or b) move back to London where we have PROPER PLACES TO RUN IN and then I see the sign for Headcorn and I don’t remember seeing the other sign that says it’s a mile and a quarter away and then I think I’m on the road that turns into a pavement in a bit and then it does turn into a pavement and I get round the corner and walk up the hill to get over the trauma.

Distance: 2.34 miles
Time: 24:59
Pace: 10:41 m/m
Calories: 207
Cats weeing on rugs: 1
Old ladies with magical powers: 1
Bunnies: 1
Baby bunnies: 2
Cows: 0
Roads fallen onto: 1
Twisted ankles: 1
Londoners moving back to London: 1

Everything looks like a cow

For some strange reason, although I was up early yesterday, spent the day out and about or inside packing, and completely knackered by the evening and falling asleep reading my book in bed, then I couldn’t sleep and kept waking up and was even woken up by the cat being sick and the bread machine doing it’s thing and so at 6:30am I get up before my fake sunrise comes on and before the bread machine has finished doing its thing and as I’m not aching after yesterday’s pitifully slow three miler, I decide to do another run.  Woo, get me, Miss Finely Tuned Athlete.

I clean up the cat sick and go into the bedroom to get changed into my running gear and I realise that yesterday when I carefully picked out enough clothes, including running gear (on the assumption that I’d do two more runs this week) to last me until Saturday as I packed away all my other clothes (two bin bags full for the bin, four bin bags full coming with me), I didn’t keep out any running socks and so I’ve got to wear normal socks to run in and then I’ve got to decide whether to wear the ones with monkeys, sheep, cats or cows on and I decide on the ones with sheep on and my Garmin gets a signal in record time and I leave the house at 7:30am hoping the postman doesn’t come in the next half an hour as I’m expecting three more parcels of stuff I bought via eBay and I hope I don’t have to wait all day for the postman as I need to get to the sorting office before 1:00 when it shuts to see if they’ve had my parcel from Saturday returned there yet and I don’t want my tenant getting all my parcels and parading around in my new sunglasses, whilst drinking out of my new cow mug and making jewellery with my new beads.

Ladybird Book of Farm AnimalsI go to the marshes via the boring way first this time and as I go towards the bridge another runner’s coming towards me and I think, aah, another hardcore runner, running early in the morning, I bet he says hello to me, the hardcore runners are usually the friendliest and he does indeed say hello to me and I say hello back, so he knows I’m also a hardcore runner and not just a red-faced shuffling thing and I get through the bridge and I think I see cows and then I think no, they’re not cows because a) the cows aren’t due back until July; and b) they’re horses and I think I’d better get the Ladybird Book of Farm Animals before I move so I don’t go up to horses and say moo and look stupid in front of the Country People.

And then I’m back to thinking about what to pack next, as I’ve still got a desk to sort out and the entire contents of my kitchen to pack and I think I could pack all my dishes and stuff and just use one plate and knife and fork and wash them up every day and then I think HUSH!  WHAT AM I THINKING? DO MY OWN WASHING UP? I don’t think so and then my thoughts turn to Juneathon and I wonder if Joggerblogger/[rich] will mind if I take over if he can’t do it this year and Hauling My Carcass has asked what the Rules of Juneathon are and so here’s a quick rundown and I will be reminding everyone later in the month and cracking the whip then.

Juneathon rules
Run or exercise every day
Blog about it

Easy, huh?

And then I get home and my hair’s all over the place and I think maybe I should get a hairband like the new doctor in Eastenders wears when he’s out for a run (which seems to be most of the time) and I think no, he looks like a dork.

Distance: 3.03 miles
Time: 34:20
Pace: 11:20 m/m
Calories: 255
Cat sick: 1
Fresh loaves of bread: 1
Pairs of sheep socks: 1
Hardcore runners recognising me as a fellow hardcore runner and not a red-faced shuffling thing: 1
Horses: lots
Cows: 0
Plates I’m going to wash up myself: 0
Rules of Juneathon: 2
New dorky looking doctors in Eastenders who do nothing but run all day: 1
Foo Fighters
Duran Duran
Electric Soft Parade
Cardiacs & Affectionate Friends

Slipping down the slacker list

Although not quite into the smartarse list yet.

Still, after waking up and smelling my freshly baked cheddar, sun-dried tomato and olive bread (which you can look at on my new blog, plug plug), I make a cup of tea (Twining’s Echinacea & Raspberry), empty the dishwasher (Smeg, stainless steel), feed the cat (small, black) and write down my dream in my notebook which consists of four pages (the dream, not the notebook, um, I don’t mean the dream was about four pages, oh you know what I mean) and an armache due to me not being very practised in the art of putting pen to paper these days, what with finger to keyboard being the more modern way of doing things and I’m up bright and early and think the sooner I go out, the sooner I can come back and munch on the bread and I think it’s going to be cold and Shaun said it was going to be minus 2 and I think maybe I’ll wear my Helly Hansen top underneath my usual long sleeve top (Nike?  Adidas?) and then I think that’ll be uncomfortable but then I think that’s what base layers are for, for wearing underneath other things and so I put two tops on and it’s not uncomfortable and I go outside and the canal’s higher than I’ve ever seen it and it must be full of melted snow and I wonder if the cows have gone as I didn’t see them from the train the other day although I did see some lumps but wasn’t sure if the lumps were snow covered cows or snow cows or just lumps of snow or what and an old lady on a bicycle cycles past me and nods and smiles and I think old ladies on bicycles I can probably put up with, it’s just the rest of the cycling population I can live without and I go past a building site and I think why is there a building site in the marshes? I don’t want a building site in the marshes, this is a nature reserve and I go through the bridge and then there’s a big iced over puddle and I wonder if I tread on it and the ice breaks will I fall through and drown? and I decide probably not as it’d only be about 2 inches deep and then I think hang on, it’s a well known fact that you can drown in 2 inches of water isn’t it? and so I don’t tread on the iced over puddle in case I drown and I get onto the boring bit and I can’t get right over to the edge and I turn my iPod down so I can hear any cars coming and I think that’s no good, Courtney Love is singing and Courtney needs to be LOUD and I get to where the pavement comes back and turn my iPod back up and a skinny girl who seems to consist of nothing but long limbs runs past and Blur come on with Girls & Boys and it sounds brilliant and spurs me on and I don’t notice the rest of the boring bit and I was supposed to list my top ten running tunes as I was tagged by The Red Bucket but I didn’t think I had any but now I have one.  Is that ok Mr Bucket?

Distance: 3.01 miles
Time: 32:17
Pace: 10:44 m/m
Calories: 290
Loaves of cheddar, sun-dried tomato and olive bread: 1
Aching arms due to writing four pages with a pen: 1
Old ladies on bicycles: 1
Ice puddles waiting to drown me: 1
Top running tunes on my list of 10: 1
Electric Soft Parade
Duran Duran

Um, a two mile walk is the same as a six mile run, right?

I have too much sleep and get up knackered and I think why am I knackered, I haven’t had a drink for a week and have been getting early nights and everything and I should be as fit as a fiddle but I decide I have to do my six miler anyway and I even have some cereal for a change in the hope that it will give me energy and I set Cedric to pace me at 10:30 minute miles even if anything over 10 m/m is really crap and means you’re not a proper runner because apparently you’re only a proper runner if you do 9 m/m but who wants to do things properly anyway? and I do my usual wasting time on Facebook thing and laugh at the old school pictures the former Miss Lamb has put up and I put a potato in the oven to await my return from my long run and I get out the door and see the recycling bins and remember that someone stole the clothes I put out for recycling and I wonder if they were cold or just had an impeccable sense of style and I also wonder why they took the orange jumper but not the black Diesel combats that had only been worn once and I get towards the bridge and there’s a car coming towards me and I look behind me and there’s a man running up to me and I slow down to let him overtake but he tucks in behind me while the car goes past and then he overtakes me and I should have said thanks or something but I don’t as I’m too knackered and I go through the bridge and think what if I didn’t turn the gas on the oven properly or what if the flame goes out and there’s gas pouring into my house? and then I remember I’ve got an electric oven and I go over the next bridge and there’s plastic covering all over it and it’s quite nice and cosy although it’s a shame I can’t see the river while I’m going over it and I remember I nearly skidded across the next bridge and so I walk over it this time instead of skating over it and I’m feeling really knackered now and I think I’m going to have to stop and walk and so I do stop to walk and then I see the cows and two of the cows are kissing and then they stop kissing and one of them starts licking the other one’s neck and the one having its neck licked is looking at me like what are you looking at? and I’m thinking well, I’m looking at you having your neck licked by the other cow, it’s not something I see every day and I’m still walking and I’ve got two miles to walk and then I think ah, I’ll call it cross-training, cross-training is good and I cross the boardwalk and up the steep bit and onto the path and there’s two girls running and I think not fair, I want to be running but it’s not happening today and then they start walking and I think maybe I should run now and overtake them but then I think no, because I’ll probably have to stop and walk after two yards and they’ll laugh and point at me and so I walk a bit faster and overtake them that way and then one of them runs and overtakes me and I wonder why she’s left the other one behind and I get to the stables and wonder if I can manage a bit of a jog and I think I’ll wait ’til I’m round the corner where no one can see me if I have to stop again and I get round the corner and run really slowly up to the bridge and I get over the bridge and across the road and my iPod’s playing crap songs, well it might be crap but I’ve never heard most of it before and I think I’ll skip through the songs and see if there’s one that will give me a bit of a boost and Death House Chaplain’s Wherewithal comes on and I think hooray, I like that one and although it’s not exactly a good running song I decide to run until it finishes and then Graham Coxon is singing All Over Me and Graham Coxon is cool and although I hate to skip through Graham Coxon, this song is even less of a good running song and so, sorry Graham, I skip through it and Marc Almond starts singing Sex Dwarf and I think ah, that’s more like it.

Stats (running bit):
Distance: 1.76 miles
Time: 18:39
Pace: 10:34 m/m
Calories: 168
Thieves with impeccable dress sense: 1
Plastic bridges: 1
Cows kissing: 2
Cows having their necks licked: 1
Stats (walking bit)
Distance: 1.70 miles
Time: 23:33
Pace: 13:49
Calories: 147
Long runs successfully completed: 0
Proper runners: 0

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