As I don’t have one of those proper day job things that involve sitting in an office all day, I don’t get that Friday Feeling but I still feel the need to celebrate public holidays by drinking and eating too much and wasting time on Facebook and Twitter, but wasting time on Twitter can pay off. My last three web design clients have come from there (a charity in Devon and two authors) and the other day, I tweeted about my new sports bras that had come in the post (yes, my tweets are that exciting) that no, weren’t freebies but yes, I had paid for them.
Shortly after tweeting this mega-exciting update on my life, Boobydoo tweeted me and said oh, you should have got in touch with us, we’d have sent you something, and so I said I could always do with new sports bras and so they sent me a Shock Absorber Run Bra.
It looks highly technical with all its straps and clasps. My favourite sports bras have been the crop top type that you pull over your head and then struggle to get off after you’ve sweated all over it. This one has kind of polystyreney feeling adjustable straps going down the back (don’t let that put you off, I’m not sure ‘polystyrene’ is the right word but I can’t think what I mean; maybe more neopreney than polystyreney). They’re different to the usual bra straps where you have to lengthen the strap by tugging at it and adjusting it as these have little hooks that you pull out of a little sleeve and put in another sleeve, either higher or lower.
There’s also a clasp at the top and the usual hook and eye clasps at the bottom. As I’m lazy and used to my crop tops, I try to pull it on as a crop top and don’t undo the bottom clasps, but it gets stuck around my shoulders so I pull it off and undo the clasps and try to do it up like a normal person. It takes a while to do up as I’m not very good at doing up bras but I get there eventually and this must be the comfiest bra in the world ever. Being the most comfiest bra ever isn’t the most major factor in sports bra factors though: boobage movage is, so I tested this by jumping up and down. Nothing moved. Result. Another good thing about it is that it’s not padded like the Shock Absorber bra I got at the traumatic Mateivator workout that has removable pads that which, because they’re removable, get all twisted and folded up in their pockets when they’re being washed and then you have to faff about taking them out and untwisting them and putting them back in. So, comfort, support and lack of faff, splendid.
I put on the rest of my gear and decide to wear my Haile Gebrselassie world record breaking shoes and set off down the street.
My world record breaking shoes are really light and I feel like I’m gliding along (I’m well aware that any witnesses would probably not have used the word ‘gliding’ if asked to describe my running style) and my boobs are staying in place which is more than I can say for my belly which is wobbling about and I wonder why no one’s invented a belly bra and if any inventors are reading my blog, can you invent one please?
I decide just to do two miles and to do it without stopping but I get to two miles and I’m feeling good and so I decide to do three miles and whoop whoop, I do three miles at under 11 minute miles which must be some kind of miracle or maybe it was the new bra, which is by far the best sports bra I’ve ever worn (I’m never going back to cheap ones again) or maybe it was the Trion:Z bracelet or maybe it was the world record breaking shoes or maybe it was my athlete’s dinner last night of two slices of garlic bread and half a flapjack or maybe it was all the spin and body pump classes I’ve been going to?
And speaking of spin and body pump classes, I’ll be doing those at the gym tomorrow morning, where I’m going, not to avoid the Royal Wedding, but to avoid Twitter where my fellow human beings will dishearten me by directing a load of scorn, contempt, hatred and abuse at a young couple purely for having the nerve to get married. I mean, they’re hardly Jordan and Alex Reid, are they? Just because Prince William’s mum was a media-hungry attention-seeking strumpet, doesn’t mean he and his bride-to-be are. Good luck to them, I say.
Distance: 3.02 miles
Friday Feelings: 0
Boobage movage: 0
Belly movage: lots
Fantastic new sports bras: 1
Nasty mean people on twitter to be avoided tomorrow: hundreds