B&Q bathroom installation – day 11

Donald’s very punctual and arrives at 9:50. I say are you going to solve all my problems for me. He says he’ll see what he can do. He gets the taps out of the box and puts them on the floor and stares at them for a few minutes. He plays around with them on the bath in various positions and says yes they will fit, the plumber just needs to play around with them and it’s also up to me, depending on where I want them. I say I’m beyond caring, I don’t care where they go, you can have that in writing, as far as I’m concerned they can go on the ceiling as long as I get my bath installed.

I say will they definitely fit? He says they should do. I say I need to know they’ll definitely fit as I’ve already had two plumbers say they don’t fit and I don’t want another plumber coming round on Monday saying they don’t fit. I say can he tell the plumber that they’ll fit. Donald has another look under the bath and says there’ll be a lot of pipework. I say is it easier if I get new taps? He says I can get a mixer tap but the hose will go up the wall. I say that’s good because then I can use it as a shower. I say do you have taps in stock? He says yes and he’ll get me some as similar to the ones I’ve got as he can. He says he’ll see what he can get and also send my taps to the supplier to see why they don’t fit. I couldn’t give a shit why they don’t fit but decide not to tell Donald that as he’s being as helpful as he can. He says he’ll get Maryam to call me later and he’ll bring the taps round to me tomorrow as he only lives round the corner. I ask him to shout at the fitters until they agree to come round first thing Monday as it’s not funny any more. He said he only heard about the problem yesterday and that if he’d known earlier he would have come to have a look then.

Fingers crossed Donald is going to be my saviour. I can’t really see him shouting at the plumbers though until they agree to come round. Might have to get Alan on the case. I gave him the day off from me ringing to moan at him yesterday so he should be refreshed now.

Update
No one’s rung me by 2:30 so I ring the store to speak to Maryam.  I get told she’s at lunch and will be back in about 45 minutes and will be asked to call me.

Maryam does ring at 3:15 and says she’s spoken to Donald and she’s spoken to PCH who say that those taps do fit the bath and the taps are designed to go anywhere on the bath and she’ll speak to the fitter to say that they can fit the bath.

I say but Donald says it was easiest for me to get new taps and he was going to get me some and bring them round tomorrow.  Maryam says that they don’t have any taps even close to the ones I have and only mixer taps.  I say a mixer tap is fine.  She says I said I didn’t want to change my taps as I liked the look of them.  I said yes but Donald said that it would be tight and loads of pipework and he wasn’t 100% sure that they would fit.  She said that’s not what he said to her.

I said can Donald come round Monday morning with the plumber and show him how to fit it, because as far as I was concerned, Donald was getting me new taps and bringing them round tomorrow, if I thought I was keeping the old taps I would have made notes of where Donald said the taps would fit.  Maryam says she’ll see when a fitter can come round.  I said I need one first thing Monday.  She said she’ll call me back.

Waa!!!!!!!!!!!  This is going round in circles.

I swear I’m going to kill someone soon.

Update #2
Maryam’s not called back by 4:45 so I give her a ring.  She says she can’t get through, she’s been on hold for 45 minutes.  I say can’t get through to the fitters?  She says no, the ISC who send the fitters out, she has to go through them.  It dawns on me that the ISC is the Installation Service Centre (duh!).  I say can’t she ring the fitters direct?  She says no, they won’t take any notice of her.  I say yeah, I’ve spoken to them, they’re a rude bunch aren’t they?  She says she has to go through the ISC and she’ll keep trying and can I try and get through to them as well.  She says the ISC has to handle it all so they know just how useless they are and how many problems I have with them.  I tell her that yesterday’s fitter left my window wide open.  She says she’ll let them know about that and if I don’t hear from her today, she’ll call me tomorrow.

Why did I ever go to B and f*****g Q?!!!!!