Royal Mail eventually decide to deliver some wire to me and I stay up late drinking wine and making this

and this

and after I’ve finished drinking wine and being a famous jewellery designer, I set up the bread machine and go to bed and awake to the smell of freshly baked bread and then I remember that along with being a famous jewellery designer and a domestic goddess, I am also a finely tuned athlete and I go out for a four mile run round the marshes and there’s a nice blue sky

and I decide to start with the most boring mile in the world ever although it does have a lake

but the lake is mostly hidden by a fence and then I get to the bridge where Ben came off his bike and broke his jaw and I look under the bridge and I think I can see someone on the other side but my eyesight is shit and I’m not really sure and I get through the bridge and there is someone there and I can’t see a dog as I only trust people over the marshes if they have dogs but he hasn’t got a dog but he has got a scooter and I think should I trust people with scooters? and I think na, people with scooters are well dodgy and I get round the corner and there’s a swan cleaning itself

and I get to the marina and run alongside the river and I get to the bridge that gives a nice view of the marshes and I stop to take a picture

and a woman comes along and stands next to me and starts stretching and she’s about an inch away and I think are you sure you’re fucking standing close enough to me or what? and I decide she looks dodgy and I put my phone back in my pocket and run off and then I get to where the cows live and I look at my Garmin and I’ve only gone two miles and I think shit, my house isn’t two miles away, how am I going to do four miles and I think I’ll have to do a lap of the park when I get back and I get to the stables and walk through the gate and then I realise I’m still walking and I think oops, I’m supposed to be training for a half-marathon so I’d better start running and I think I need someone to write me a schedule and nag me into doing it and I also think that I need to cut out the Friday night bottle of wine as it doesn’t help me much with my Saturday morning run but at 6 o’clock last night in Sainsburys it seemed like the best idea in the world and then I get to my house and I’ve only done 3.7 miles so I do a lap of the park and then go home to investigate the freshly baked bread.


Distance: 4.16 miles
Time: 47:12
Pace: 11:20
Calories: 404
Blue skies: 1
Swans cleaning themselves: 1
Loaves of freshly baked bread: 1
Peter, Bjorn & John
Bobby Conn
The Young Knives
Stereo Total


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