Commutation ticket
I slacked last week. I slacked and slacked and slacked and then I slacked some more. In fact I slacked so much I even decided not to do my usual long(ish) Saturday run, preferring instead to lie in and then dye my hair and make a necklace.
So this week I decided to unslack myself and do my running-home-from-work-thing which I can no longer call a running commute. Because it isn’t one. Trivia time, feel free to skip this bit: A commutation ticket was the American name for a season ticket. The word “commuter” replaced “season ticket holder” in the 1950s and by 1960, it was so popular that it was confusingly used to cover anyone travelling to and from work. (Thank you “Queuing for Beginners” by Joe Moran for this information). So, because I’m such a pedant, I can no longer call it a running commute. Just as well a running-home-from-work-thing is just as catchy.
Still, off I go on my running-home-from-work-thing and I decide to walk until my Garmin gets a signal which is just as I get to the only hill in Central London; who thought it was a good idea to put a hill in Farringdon? And I run up the hill and get round the corner and my knees are stiff and I think uh oh, this is going to be difficult, maybe I should have gone out for a walk at lunchtime instead of reading about the history of the desk and queuing and I get to Angel which is as usual full of people annoying me by trying to give me a free newspaper or leaflets about Salsa lessons or whatever it was the people in yellow were trying to give me or idiots not looking where they’re going because they’re texting or lighting cigarettes and I wonder how many more times I’m going to call someone a prick on my way home and I think it’s probably a habit I should get out of before I get to Hackney because that could have some serious repercussions and as I’m going down Essex Road there’s a man in front of me reading the paper and I can see the headline and it says CYCLISTS V LORRIES: DEBATE or something like that and I think what about PEDESTRIANS V CYCLISTS? Are we supposed to be feeling sorry for cyclists? and I think I would have more sympathy for the squished cyclists if they stopped trying to squish pedestrians and I manage to make it to the end of Essex Road without walking and I’m wondering if I can make it to the end of Balls Pond Road and way hey I do and I think uh oh, round the corner is where I always always always want to – and usually do – stop. But I carry on round the where I usually stop bit and go past the smelly shop and over the zebra and then Haircut 100 comes on and I think shit, will I have to admit to that on my blog? and I get past Hackney Downs station and I still haven’t stopped to walk and then I get to the steep bit and I think uh oh, it’s a steep bit then I think it’s just psychological, I can walk up hills really slowly climb up mountains, just get on with it and I do just get on with it and then I get to the flat bit and I think almost at Murder Mile, not far to go now and just as I’m approaching Murder Mile a man is smiling at me and saying something but I can’t hear what he’s saying and although he looks friendly enough I’d really rather people didn’t approach me on Murder Mile and then I’m going down the road that has half of the pavement as a cycle lane and a cyclist comes from behind and I watch him to make sure he doesn’t veer off over the white line and onto the people bit of pavement but he doesn’t and then I’m going up the path and before I get there a cyclist goes in and I think wait for me, you can save me from any psychopaths but he’s too quick and has gone and I wonder if there’s anyone working in the factories and how loud can I scream and I think probably not very loud if I get a knife stuck in my throat, I’d probably just gurgle a bit and I wonder how loud I can gurgle and then I think I shouldn’t be thinking things like that and stop being paranoid anyway and then as I’m going round the corner someone comes up from behind me and I jump but it’s only a cyclist and I don’t have to practice my gurgling skills and then I’m home and I’ve run the whole way home without walking for the first time in about a year. Yay.
Splits
Stats:
Distance: 6.18 miles
Time: 1:12:28
Pace: 11:44
Calories: 610
Music:
Black Kids
MGMT
Haircut 100
Dexys Midnight Runners
Radiohead
Eighties Matchbox B-Line Disaster
Ian Brown
Panic At The Disco
Seahorses
The Police
Blondie
Success! This walking habit seems to be catching and it looks like you may have just shaken the bug. Keep it that way.
I think the trick with loud gurgling is to put you hand of the spurting bit and then shout. I reckon it will work.
Well please make sure you do your running-home-from-work-thing more often, cos your blog makes me laugh out loud, unlike the work I’m meant to be doing.
Yay, brilliant!