Blame it on the mushroom soup
Because I am such a self-disciplined and highly motivated individual, I duly trot off back to the gym after work today to do the two miles or cross training that my schedule insists I do or forever be damned. Or something like that. But at lunchtime I am struck down by mystery stomach cramps after consuming half a litre of homemade mushroom soup and I think ooooooooooh no, I have mystery stomach cramps, hope they’ve gone by the time I go home and I spend the rest of the afternoon feeling so-so and I see the banana on my desk and think maybe the banana will make me feel better so I eat the banana and the banana makes me hungry so I eat the Special K cranberry cereal bar that I got for free in the gym on Monday and haven’t eaten yet and the cereal bar makes me want something else sweet so I have some hot chocolate and by the time it gets to home time I’m wondering if I’ve eaten and drunk too much as my belly is feeling rather full but I go to the gym and they haven’t got the air conditioning on high tonight, they’ve got the heating on full power instead and I get changed and get on the treadmill and at three minutes I don’t think I can carry on and at 6 minutes I think I’m going to stop at ten minutes as I’ve definitely had enough and at 9:15 I think I’ll put the speed up a bit for the last 45 seconds and then I do the cool down bit and get off the treadmill and think I might as well go on the rowing machine while I’m here and then I think actually, that’s a good idea as my schedule says to do two miles or cross-train and so if I do a bit of both then I haven’t failed and I won’t be forever damned or anything and there’s a girl on the cross-trainer in front of me being a shining example of why you shouldn’t wear grey marl to the gym as her sweat forms a perfect outline of her knickers and I do 15 minutes on the rowing machine and then I think I might as well go on the cross-trainer while I’m here and I get on the cross-trainer but after three minutes I’m feeling a bit sick so I get off and get back to the changing room with it’s heating on full blast and I go home and look at my schedule and it says to do 3.5 miles tomorrow and I think oh fuck.
Stats:
Distance: 1.00 mile
Time: 10:00 minutes
Pace: 10:00 m/m
Calories: 99
How about a 3.5 mile lunchtime run, followed by soup and a sweaty keyboard for the afternoon?