Spit or swallow?

After sleeping all the way through the night un-wine-induced for the first time since I got here, I decide today I really should start some kind of training, seeing as I’ve got the Crisis Square Mile Run next week and the Staplehurst Carnival ‘n’ Fete 10k in four weeks and although the Crisis run won’t be a problem (especially if we get that 15 minute standing break under London Bridge again this year, not to mention the first half mile being practically at a standstill anyway), I struggle with 10ks at the best of times.  So, even though I was dying to get back out on my SGB again, I put my trainers on and head out for the two mile route and as I get up the road I see an ambulance and an old lady looking at it and I wonder if it’s like hearses and maybe I should slow down out of respect but then I realise it’s just a BT van and the old lady is at a bus stop and the old lady says morning and I think Random Bus Stop Old Lady is very polite and I go round the corner onto the road that’s about two feet wide and an old man on a bicycle comes past and says morning and I think old people are polite round here and then a fly flies into my mouth and I think ick and it’s on the back of my tongue and I think spit or swallow? and I think, I’m vegetarian, I can’t swallow a fly and perhaps I’ll die and so I spit it out although I think spitting is disgusting and if I see anyone spitting I give them a dirty look and call them a dirty peasant and then I can hear a car coming up behind me and so I follow Adele‘s advice and stay on the road and let it go around me and it does indeed go around me and I don’t end up splatted on the road with tyre marks over my back and I get to the tree and turn off and there’s roadworks and a sign that says wait when the light shows red but the lights aren’t showing anything and I don’t think they apply to me anyway and then I get to the pavement and turn my iPod up and I’m pretty knackered and not sure I can make it up the hill butI give it a go but get too tired and stop to walk but leave my Garmin on so it can shame me with my stats for being a slacker.

Route

Splits

Stats:
Distance: 2.25 miles
Time: 23:21
Pace: 10.22 m/m
Calories: 199
BT vans pretending to be ambulances: 1
Polite random old ladies at bus stops: 1
Polite old men on bicycles: 1
Flies in mouth: 1
Flies spat out: 1
Red lights: 0
Hills masterfully conquered: 0
Music:
Garbage
Faith No More
Nirvana