Who turned the lights off?

Up late again, due to spending all night watching The Apprentice, The Goodies and The Day John Lennon Died (I was going to watch To Kill A Mockingbird that I had recorded, but it had the little deaf dude in the corner and it was distracting me) and so I get up around lunchtime and go to the supermarket and when I get back I make some hot chocolate and I think oh no, I’ve forgotten about Janathon and it’s going to be dark by the time I go out and when I get round to going out I put on my hi-vis jacket and get my purple bike that has lights on out of the garage and I go down the road and then remember that country lanes don’t have streetlights and I’ve only ever cycled back from town before where it’s light and it’s pitch black and I can only see about two feet ahead of me and it’s quite scary and whenever a car comes in the opposite direction their headlights are so bright I can’t see anything at all and that’s not quite scary, it’s fucking well scary, and I get back to the main road and there still aren’t any streetlights and I think why the hell aren’t there any lights on the main road and I get back after cycling 5.5 miles in the dark.

Stats (cycling)
Distance: 5.5 miles
Time: 34:10
Speed: 9.7mph
Calories: 171
Deaf dudes: 1
Hot chocolates: 1
Streetlights: 0

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