On the 16th day of Juneathon, I lost my job

But as I’d been there for four months, instead of the six weeks I was originally hired for, I can’t complain. So, in six weeks, I can go back to being a full-time lady of leisure. Yay.

And after I went to work and lost my job, I cycled home and am now very saddle sore.

Stats (cycling)
Distance: 16.91 miles
Time: 1:43:57
Speed: 9.8 mph
Calories: 520
Jobs: 0
Sore bums: 1

Juneathon 2010 logo and prize unveiled!

Woo hoo, how exciting. Today I have:

a) the new Juneathon logo to unveil, thanks to the mega-talented [rich] (aka Joggerblogger); and

b) details of the prizes. (Ok, prize. Singular. (Actually, there will be another prize but that remains secret and not just because I don’t know what it is. I do know. So there.))

Here we are then, courtesy of that JB bloke, the new logo.

Feel free to copy it onto your own blog posts. In fact, I insist.

Ok, so you’ve scanned to see what the prize is. I’m getting to that bit now.

Today I got an email from a man called Andy from Fitness Footwear. Actually, his name is Adam but as he addressed the email ‘Dear Carly’, I thought it only fair to call him a similar it-starts-with-the-same-letter-and-has-the-same-number-of-letters-in-it-but-that’s-where-the-similarity-ends name.

imageAnyway, Adam asked if I’d like a pair of Vibram Five Fingers Classics to give away as the winner’s prize* and so I said ‘yes please’.

In case you don’t know what they are or what they look like, that’s them on the left. Yes, I know they look weird. But runners look weird anyway, so it’s not like anyone’s going to laugh at you more than they do now, is it?

I’m going to keep the roll call where it is, so if you want to join in, add a comment to the Juneathon 2010 FAQ and Roll Call and I’ll add you to the list.

(p.s. Today I went for an interview for a job in a running shop. Can you all send either a) positive vibes my way; or b) a big bribe to the owners of my local running shop please? Ta.)

*Legal stuff:

The winner is entitled to choose one pair of Vibram Five Fingers Classic shoes from FitnessFootwear.com. Prize cannot be exchanged for cash. The judge’s decision is final.

Return to the rat race

Yesterday I had a brainwave and thought to myself, aah, I used to work at home editing transcripts of live court hearings, I can do that again and so I email the company who gave me the work and said oi, gizza job, and my old boss phones and says yes, we should be able to give you enough work, come and see me tomorrow to have a chat and so I go to see him and I know where it is because they are in the building that I have just spent three years working in before I went to work for the crooks but I won’t bump into any ex-workmates as they celebrated my departure by moving into a swanky new office two days after I left but I get down the corridor and the building receptionist says Cathy, have you come to see me? and I say of course, how are you? and he asks me how the new office is and I say I don’t work for them any more but I don’t bother telling him about the crooks and I say do you want me to sign in? and he says no, just go up, you know where it is? and I say yes and I go up and speak to the man about the job and he says he should be able to pretty much keep me in full-time work if I want it and definitely until the end of July and I think that’s pretty cool, I’ll do that until then and then I’ll have August off and sunbathe or something and he says can I come in and work in the office for three days next week and I say yes, that’s fine and I go home and have emailed to me the software I need to set me up and while I’m on the phone getting set up I’m asked if I can work now.  What, like right now?!!!  Yes.  Bollocks.  I say yes, that’s fine and so I spend the afternoon working and then I get an email asking if I can work all next week and I think oh noooooooooooooooooooo, I liked the three days idea but I don’t want to look unwilling so I email back and say  yes, that’s fine, see you on Monday.


And in case you’re wondering what this has to do with Juneathon, I walked from Liverpool Street instead of getting the tube.  It counts.

Miles walked: 3
New jobs: 1
Days left of being an unemployed pikey: 0
Juneathons completed: 6/6

Juneathon Day 3

I get up early (and remember, to anyone unemployed, any time before lunchtime Neighbours is early) with the intention of doing a mile before heading off to agency no. 1 to see if they can de-unemployed pikey me and it has to be just a mile as I have to give off an air of sleek professionalism and not that of a drowned rat and my hair will ming far less after a mile than after three miles but then I look out of the window and FUCK, IT’S RAINING and that puts paid to that then and I think bollocks, I’ve got another agency to go to this afternoon and then I’m coming home, just to near enough go straight out again to meet up with an old boss from years ago who, although I’m very much looking forward to seeing again, can’t ask him for a job because a) he’s just taken on a new assistant; and b) he pays fuck all what with there not being a huge amount of money in the literary agency world.

But I am not destined to fall into the Juneathon failure bucket just yet as I have a cunning plan in that walking from the Liverpool Street agency to the Chancery Lane one counts. And it doubley counts if I walk back as well. And it’s not even hiding an unemployed pikey money saving excuse as I have a travelcard. So there.

Oh, and look, I’ve inspired someone. Yay, go me.

3 miles walking
Juneathon days completed: 3/3
People inspired by me: 1

Juneathon Day 2

Not only is it the second day of Juneathon but it’s also the first day of my new life as a lady of leisure, which I have decided sounds better than unemployed pikey.  I email the agency and say those crooks at [enter name of crooks here] have given my job back to their old secretary who came back from travelling the world early, i.e. after two weeks, the lightweight, and the agent does sound genuinely upset for me and not just because of the commission he’s just lost although he will be even more upset when he hears that the other new secretary rang the crooks this morning and told them she wasn’t going back in an act of solidarity and therefore that’s quite a lot of commission he’s just lost.  Oops.

After emailing the crooks and telling them I know about the other girl coming back, I fix up an appointment to see another agency tomorrow morning and then decide to get some Juneathoning done before continuing on my new unemployed pikey lady of leisure lifestyle and I decide to wear my new shoes but I’m wearing a red t-shirt again but I decide that not wearing red and green together hasn’t done much for my luck so far in my 38 years and so I decide to be reckless but then remember that my new shoes have weird Salomon quicklaces on them

and so I can’t tie my Nike+ pouch to them and although it’s completely pointless me taking the Nike+ Sportband out because it’s inaccurate and the calibrating didn’t work, I still want to take it out because it updates the Nike+ challenge widget thing over there on the right and makes me look like I’ve run a lot of miles and even more importantly, run further than Warriorwoman although I don’t think that’s cheating as much as trying to make out going on a Wii is valid Juneathoning.

Distance: 3.03 miles
Time: 31:42 minutes
Pace: 10:27
Calories: 305
Agencies losing lots of commision: 1
Agencies to see tomorrow: 1
Crooks emailed: 1
Days of being a lady of leisure: 1
Juneathons completed: 2/2
The Secret Machines
The Levellers
Miles completed so far
26.43 out of 100 / 23 days left

Running commute #12

I admit it.  I have been slacking.  I bailed out of running altogether at the weekend, not even thinking of doing my 15 mile cross country race or even doing a long run by myself, due to the fact that after a load of wine, chocolate and crisps the night before I was feeling decidedly ropey.

Monday morning sees me back at work after my two week break, the first week of which I spent looking (successfully) for a new job and I tell my boss I was offered another job while I was off and that I’m leaving.  He says that’s nice, well done and that I’ll be missed as I do a good job.   And I tell the agency I’m leaving on Wednesday 30 April and does the new firm want me to start on Thursday or can they wait ’til Tuesday 6 May after the Bank Holiday?  I cross my fingers while I wait for him to get back to me that they don’t mind waiting.  The agency emails and says the Tuesday will be fine.  New job, more money, time off before I start the new one. Result.

This morning I’m feeling the effects of being in the pub all evening the night before without eating and only getting five hours sleep but I have resolved to do a running commute tonight and so a running commute I shall do.

I head off for my commute and I’m glad I won’t have to do it for much longer as soon I’ll have a new commute to do, the route of which I’ve already printed off and it looks like most of it takes me a different way entirely although it still brings me to Murder Mile and as I get to Murder Mile today I see a man and I’m looking at him as there’s something not quite right and I realise it’s because he’s wearing a tie and looks very out of place and it’s still light and I cut through Millfields and decide to go through the marshes and as I get to the stables there’s a man walking through without a dog but I decide he’s just on his way home, same as me, and as I get towards the footbridge there’s a young lad with a dog which would  usually make him more trustworthy in my eyes but as he is drinking a can of Tennants Super and has a pitbull he’s looking more untrustworthy the nearer I get to him and so I speed up over the bridge and back to the safety of the street and cutting through the marshes seems to have knocked almost a mile off my running commute.  Cool.

Distance: 5.56 miles
Time: 1:06:44
Pace: 12:00 m/m
Calories: 528
New jobs: 1
Men wearing ties in Murder Mile:  1
Young men drinking Tennants Super with pitbulls: 1
The Ting Tings
Rollins Band
The Cult
Faith No More
Plain White Ts
The Killers

Geek wannabe

Surprisingly enough, I could still walk after my 14 miler on Monday so today I get up early and browse the internet for jobs and on the fourth page is MY DREAM JOB, a job for a geek, hurrah!  On an IT help desk and for proper money too.  But fuck, it’s on the fourth page and bound to have gone by now but I send my CV off to the agency anyway and also apply for a couple of other jobs too and then I grab my iPod and phone and head off for a short 6 miles and a mile later my phone rings and I think bollocks, that’ll be one of the agencies, do I stop and answer it or carry on? and so I carry on and three miles later my phone rings again and I think bollocks, that’ll be another agency and I think they can wait and I pass the slow bloke over the marshes who wears leg warmers and waves his arms around and we say morning to each other and I get home and there’s an email from an agency wanting me to go in and see them about a job I don’t want and I say ok, how about tomorrow at 11? and then my phone rings and I answer it and it’s another agency and they want me to go in today about a job I don’t want but I have to do lady of leisure type things this afternoon like go to the hairdressers and so I say how about tomorrow? and he says fine, how about 10? and I say yes and then I think bollocks, I’m supposed to be at the other agency at 11 and I’ll have to rearrange that one and I check my voicemail and hope the agency with the IT job has rung and the first message is from an agency I’ve already spoken to and the next message is from an old web design client who I decide not to call back as he’ll keep me on the phone for about three days and I thought he was getting his daughter to do his website for him now anyway? and then the next message is from the agency about the IT job and I ring him back and I say that’s my perfect job and he says looking at my CV he thinks I’m the perfect candidate for it and I say is it still available? and he says he’ll have to check with the client but he hopes so and I say I hope so too and I actually sound enthusiastic for the first time ever ever ever and now I’m going to spend the rest of the day crossing my fingers and toes that the job is still available and I can go and be a full time geek.

Distance: 6.37 miles
Time: 1:10:00
Pace: 10:59 m/m
Calories: 606
Jobs I don’t want applied for: 2
Geek jobs I do want applied for: 1
The Damned
The Horrors
Manic Street Preachers
Bobby Conn
Rolling Stones
The Shins
Stereo Total
Bikini Kill
Dirty Pretty Things

Saturday shuffle

My half-marathon training schedule was adhered to last week in a not adhered to at all kind of way due to lying on Facebook about going out for a run on Monday (but I think it’s ok to lie on Facebook, it’s only if you lie on your blog you’re in trouble) and choosing to stay in and make jewellery instead; Tuesday I had to go to the agency after work to be spoon fed lines to say at Wednesday’s interview but I did go to the gym at lunchtime; Wednesday’s interview after work didn’t happen because of the HR woman being off sick but because I hadn’t planned to run, I didn’t; Thursday night I was out watching  bands in Camden at the Dublin Castle; and Friday I went to the gym at lunchtime.

So here we are again on Saturday and I wake up knackered but remember that I can’t fit into the patchwork cords I bought in Camden on Thursday and think I won’t ever fit into them if I lie in bed all day and I wonder if I can lose enough weight to fit into them in two weeks and I think probably not but I get up anyway and go downstairs and the bread machine bleeps to signal it’s finished doing its breadmaking thing and I think I won’t piss about this morning, I’ll just reload my iPod and get out straight away but by the time my iPod’s reloaded and I’ve got changed it’s 8:45 and I think it’s almost as late as it was last Saturday when I went out and I go round the marshes and I’m going so very very very slowly and every step is an effort and I do 5k in a pathetic 36 minutes and I get to the station and my Garmin says I’ve done 3.75 miles and I think hang on a minute, last week when I got here my Garmin said I’d done 4 miles, where’s the .25 miles gone? and I think oh no, it won’t be 5 miles when I get back and I wonder if I can do a lap of the park when I get back and I think no way, I’m knackered and I get to the park and I’ve only done 4.6 miles and I think ok, I’ll do a lap of a park and I go into the park and there’s footballers in there and there’s almost as many footballs as there are footballers and they’re making me nervous and I don’t want a football to come over and trip me up and I think I can’t do a lap of the park, I’m too scared of falling over a football, I’ll have to do a figure of 8 and cut it short and I loop round and I leave the park and I’ve only done 4.8 miles and I think well that will have to be enough and I get home and my Garmin says I’ve done 4.93 miles and I think well that’s near enough 5 miles but next week I have do to 6 miles, eek and I promise to myself that next week I will run 3 times, yeah, right.

Distance: 4.93 miles
Time: 57:52
Pace: 11:43
Calories: 411
Training schedules adhered to: 0
Job interviews: 0
The Cure
The Shins
Baby Teeth

A forgetful day

Yesterday I was going to go for a run after work but I forgot and I also forgot that I was going to make pizza last night although I’d been to Sainsburys to buy pizza making provisions and so I went to the gym today at lunchtime and when I got to the changing room I realised I’d forgotten my trainers which is really dumb as they live on the floor under my desk where I put my rucksack and so I went back to work and thought I’ll do a run tonight and then the electricians came to do some electrician thing to my computer and other electrical appliances and I thought what shall I do while they’re doing their electrician thing? and I thought I know, I’ll go for a cigarette, and then I thought oh but I don’t smoke anymore, how could I forget? and the agency rings me with news of the media firm who they sent my cv over to and says they want to see you and I think hooray and wonder if she’s lying about them giving a 10% bonus each year because agencies lie a lot and the salary they’re offering is only a couple of hundred a year more than I’m getting now and she says she’ll see if they can see me one evening after work and will call me back and later in the afternoon there’s a missed call but no message and I wonder if it’s the agency and my boss lets me go home early and I get on the train and call the agency and say did you phone me, I had a missed call? and she says yes, can you go for an interview on Wednesday at 5? and I say yes, that’s fine and she says can you come and see me on Tuesday after work and I say yes I can be there about 5:30 and she says that’s great and I think I’m going to have to lie to my boss about why I want to leave early although he doesn’t usually ask why but I’m going to have to sneak into the toilets after work and get changed into something smart and hope no one sees me leave the building and I hate the sneaking about but I want a new job although my boss is still pretending to be a normal person but the bimbo in the office next door is still annoying and so a new job would be good I think and I remember I’m going out for a run tonight and I think I can’t really be bothered but then I think this half-marathon’s not going to run itself and although it’s five months away it’s going to take me that long to train and I think but it’s cold and then I think it’s going to be cold every day between now and March and anyway, since when did I mind running in the cold? and I think but I’m bored of the songs on my iPod and I think I can put new songs on my iPod and then the Polyphonic Spree comes on and I think I’ll listen to Polyphonic Spree, they always liven me up and I get home and there’s three packages of jewellery supplies waiting for me along with the Bobby Conn tickets that I’ve been waiting for since August and I think yay, it’s like Christmas every day in this house and I’m still trying to force myself to get outside and run and I go upstairs to put the Polyphonic Spree and Black Wire on my iPod and I get changed and go downstairs and inspect the packages and bollocks, one of them is the wrong stuff but never mind and I say goodbye to the cat and I get out the door and I do my 2.7 mile route but I want to make it 3 miles tonight, although I should be doing 4 but I only have one 4 mile route and I hate it hate it hate it and I need to find a new one and I keep going near my house and I still haven’t done 3 miles so I keep going until I do and I eventually get home and I think that was a nice run, why can’t I just remember how good it is sometimes and then I might have less of a struggle getting out the door and I go upstairs and my internet connection is down and I think bollocks and I phone Virgin Media and there’s a recorded message saying if you live in Walthamstow you might find a disruption to your internet service and I think eek.

Today’s route:

Distance: 3.11 miles
Time: 34:47
Calories: 271
Interviews: 1
Internet connections: 0

Polyphonic Spree
Black Wire

Lardathon Day #27

I get up bright and early at 7am which usually I would consider to be utterly and totally wrong on my day off, and especially on my last day off but it’s the day of the delivery of my new Nokia N95 which is just too exciting to risk missing although I’m not holding out much hope of Royal Mail doing their delivering on time thing and if they do, I’m not expecting them to reach their guaranteed by 1pm thing but wait, ‘kin hell, the postie arrives bright and early at 8am, woo, result!  I eagerly unwrap my new Nokia N95 and oh my, it’s so cool.  Yay.

But I have important business to attend to today, like carrying on this week’s Operation Get My Shit Together, so after four and a half hours of playing with my new Nokia N95, I eventually leave the house and go to the agency who want to give me a pep talk before my two interviews, one of which I’m not looking forward to because a) it’s not in a location I want; and b) I’d be working for a woman and I’d rather work for a man because women are too moody although my present boss is moodier than any woman I’ve ever worked for so maybe it will be a nice break but anyway when I get to the agency, the job they have is open and it’s not going to be decided who I’d work for if I got the job but anyway I go to Baker Street and have forty minutes to spare so I get a mozzarella and tomato ciabatta in keeping with this week’s toastyforlunchathon and then I have the interview which was a waste of time because although the job sounds ok, it’s not in a location I want and they’re offering less holiday than I’m getting now and no benefits.  Crap.

So off I go to Liverpool Street where I get to where the agency have told me to go and I go into a big posh building trying to remember not to talk about cows or say “innit” too much and I go up to reception and the receptionist rings the HR woman and then the receptionist tells me I’m in the wrong place and I need to go to their other office and I think stupid agency sending me to the wrong place, don’t they know I have a bad leg and I can’t be walking around all over London? but I go off to the other office and do my interview which I’m not looking forward to because I’ve been warned it’s a by the book typical HR interview which I’m always crap at, probably because I hate all the dumb questions and my eyes glaze over which is never a good thing to happen at an interview and might just possibly cause a bad impression but I think I get through it ok and don’t fall asleep too often and I get outside and ring the agency and tell him that he sent me to the wrong place and he says ooooooooooooooooohhhhhhhhhhhhhh, yes, you’re right, so I did, I’m so sorry and he says he’ll get back to me and then I go home and because it’s Friday and my feet hurt, I get a bottle of wine.  Yeah yeah, any excuse.

Lardathon stats:
Starting weight: 9 st 4
Current weight: 9 st 5
Breakfast: Toast
Lunch: Mozzarella and tomato toasted ciabatta
Dinner: Pizza
Lard based confessions: Wine, pizza
Walking around London all day going to interviews

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