It’s official. Running is the new tube journey. But without the getting stuck in a tunnel squished up against someone’s armpit bit.
Last night after consulting the AA Routeplanner which took me through Dalston, Clapton and Hackney and said it was 7.41 miles and the RAC Routeplanner which took on a slightly less dodgy route and said it was only 6.8 miles, I did a bit of a google and came up with www.walkit.com which gave me a walking route of 6.8 miles which I thought would be better than a route made for a car and then I sat down with my A-Z and tried to the follow the route, but couldn’t find some of the roads in Hackney and anyway, they were side roads and I didn’t fancy going down side roads in Hackney so I deviated from the route and plotted out one which went along busier roads but then today I looked on the map on the website and the roads they plotted looked ok and so I thought ok, I’ll highlight those roads too on my A-Z and decide which way to take when I get there.
After a mile and a quarter I got to Angel and thought bloody hell, I didn’t know Angel was just up the road, I usually get the tube here from work and it takes about 45 minutes, I’ll walk it next time. And then I was happily motoring trotting along Upper Street and turned into Essex Road and was happily plodding down there until I got bored and stopped and looked at my map to make sure I hadn’t gone too far but no, I hadn’t gone too far and there was a bit further to go and then I turned off and got to the bit where I had to decide whether to go my route, or to trust www.walkit.com‘s route and I decided to trust their route so I turned up a side street and came across the grottiest kids’ playground I’ve ever seen, although there were some daffodils in there and not wanting to be outdone by joggerblogger, who took a pic of a daffodil this morning (and it’s the nicest pic of a daffodil I’ve ever seen), took a pic of the daffodils, then realised I probably wasn’t in the best part of town to be taking my camera out of my pocket, so continued on my way.
I was plodding along quite happily hoping I’m not going to get mugged or shot or stabbed and then I get to a junction where I have to turn off somewhere and I’m not quite sure where and the map’s not very clear and I carry on running and then I consult my map again and decide I’ve gone too far up the road so go back down it and then I look at the map again and it’s still not making any sense so I go down a road and look at the map again and it’s still not making any sense so I go back up again and then go into a shop and ask the man how do I get to Downs Road, I know it’s right near here? I show him my map and I say we’re here, aren’t we? I want to go there. He stares at my map. And then he stares at my map some more. I say don’t worry, I’ll ask someone else. He says no no no, just turn right at the lights, it’s there. I say ok then, thanks. I turn right at the lights then consult my map and no it’s not the right way so I go back down the road again and twist my ankle by treading on a woman who I don’t hear coming up behind me and I say sorry and she just gives me the evils but luckily doesn’t shoot me or anything and I’m thinking this map is really crap, none of the roads are in the right place and I go back to the road I first went up and go down a road which doesn’t have a road name and decide that’s the right road and then I have to go up some more side streets and it’s dark by now and I’m lost in Hackney and my only worry about running home was being lost in Hackney so I think to myself it’s good to confront your fears but I still wasn’t very happy about being lost in Hackney and then I realise that not all the roads have road signs and I’m thinking where are all the road signs, have they all been stolen? How am I supposed to get myself unlost when there aren’t any road signs? I continue up a side road as I can see a bigger road at the end and there’s a big biker bloke fixing his bike in his front garden and I consult my map again and then go to ask the big biker bloke if he can tell me where the road is I want to go to and then I see it’s a big biker woman not a big biker bloke and I ask her if she knows where Kenninghall Road is and she says um, I know it’s right near here, not sure exactly where. I show her my map and she says oh, your map’s not quite right. I say I know, I’ve been going round in circles for ages. She says if you go back down there, then turn left, you should get to Kenninghall Road. I say, well, actually I want Lea Bridge Road, is there a quicker way to get there? She says oh yes, just carry on going and turn right, then you come to the roundabout. I say great, I didn’t want to go back down there, it’s a bit dark and isolated, thank you very much, I’ve been lost for ages. She says you’re welcome and I continue on my way and get to the roundabout and manage to find Lea Bridge Road and I think yay, only a couple of miles to go and I go past the ice rink and then suddenly it’s all dark and isolated and I think to myself since when has Lea Bridge Road been all dark and isolated, it doesn’t look like this on a Saturday morning and I thought the marshes were kind of caged in but I’m running alongside the marshes and they’re all open and anyone could just drag me in there but after a little while it gets more built up and then I’m almost home and I dive into Somerfield and get a bottle of wine and eventually make it home, yay.
Today’s route
Stats:
Miles: 7.30
Total time: 1:42:52
Average pace: 14:05 minute/mile
Total calories: 651
Times looked at map: 15+
Maps not making sense: 1
Road signs in Hackney: not many
Music:
Scissor Sisters – I Can’t Decide
Strokes – Last Night
The Fiery Furnaces – 1917
The Damned – Nasty
Cardiacs – Jibber And Twitch
Rachel Stamp – Homemade Sex Change
Black Eyed Peas v Britney Spears – Toxic To Shut Up
Cardiacs – A Little Man And A House
Ween – The Mollusk
Stereo Total – Liebe Zu Dritt
Adam And The Ants – Stand And Deliver
Baby Teeth – The Three Sisters
The Music – The Truth Is No Words
Dixie Chicks – Not Ready To Make Nice
Human League – Louise
Seahorses – Love Is The Law
Ween – Even If You Don’t
The Cinematics – Break
The Cure – Bloodflowers
Muse – New Born
The Gossip – On The Prowl
Eminem – Stan
Neneh Cherry – 7 Seconds
The Police – Spirits In The Material World
Scissor Sisters – Comfortably Numb
Babes In Toyland – Won’t Tell
Soft Cell – Seedy Films
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