New shoes, and they’re pink, too

My current running shoes – a pair of Brooks and a pair of Asics – have been giving me a blister for a while now and although they haven’t done a huge amount of mileage, they have been through a lot of mud and water and I decided that was the reason they’ve been hurting me and so I decided I needed new shoes.

Shaun also wanted to get new shoes and so, when I said that Sweatshop in Maidstone was open until 8pm, we went there yesterday evening when he got back from work.

We stood around looking gormless for a while until a young pretty girl came over and asked if we needed help and so I said I’d like some new shoes please and I told her about my Brooks and my Asics (I was wearing the Brooks as they were slightly cleaner than my Asics) and said I didn’t really want Brooks again as I only got them because the shop didn’t have any Asics and she said she’d get me some Asics to try on.

Shaun said he fancied a change from Asics and so she said she’d bring him some Nikes and she came back with a box of Asics for me and I opened the box, hoping they weren’t blue as I don’t like blue and, hooray, they were a nice pinky-purpley-cerise colour


and Shaun opened his box and took out THE MOST DISGUSTING SHOES IN THE WORLD EVER


(they don’t look too bad in the photo but believe me, these were the ugliest shoes I’ve ever seen) and I start to laugh and feel smug as I have pretty shoes that, as well as being pretty, are as comfy as fuck, and Shaun asks the girl if she has any nicer looking shoes and she says she’ll get some Adidas for him to try but he tries the Nikes on anyway and the girl gets him to run on the treadmill and says he has a beautiful gait… but… but I can’t remember what the but was for and she said a load of other technical stuff which I’m sure Shaun will blog about and then I got on the treadmill and she said that I run with a nice neutral gait but that I have big hips and… and I can’t remember what the and was for but she said I should practice walking straight and I’m wondering if I should punch her for saying I’m wonky with a big bum but I decide not to punch her in case I get thrown out of the shop and I don’t want to get thrown out as I want to buy the nice comfy pretty Asics and then Shaun tries on the Adidas and gets on the treadmill again and he decides to buy the Adidas and while I’m waiting for him a load of people turn up for the running club they have there and on the board it says that Monday nights are for run/walk beginners but the people who have turned up don’t look like noobs as they’re all wearing proper technical vests and short shorts and proper shoes and noobs wear cotton t-shirts and tracksuits and shoes that cost £10 from the cheapy shoe shop and wear two bras at once instead of a proper sports bra, don’t they, or is that just me?

Anyway, after we’ve both finished on the treadmill and getting lots of good advice from the sales assistant, we go to pay for our new shoes and she says mine are £60, which is less than I’ve ever paid for proper running shoes. Bargain.

And so I took them out for a three mile run this morning and they were bouncy and cushiony and comfy and didn’t give me a blister. Hurrah.

Distance: 3 miles
Time: 35:21
Pace: 11:47
Calories: 315
Pairs of nice new pinky-purpley-cerise Asics: 1
Ugly pairs of Nike shoes that stayed in the shop: 1
Sales assistants telling me I’m wonky and have a big bum: 1
Noobs at the running club: 0
Blisters: 0