Flipping farmers furrowing fields

I used to hate alliteration before doing my OU course. But then I started to quite like it as it was used quite often and now I think it’s quite the bees’ bollocks (sorry for the mixed metaphor but I was also taught to avoid clichés like the plague).

I did do a run last week that I should have blogged but didn’t. I was going to blog about it, but got side-tracked and I haven’t even got my list of prompts/memory guides so you could at least have had a kind of join-the-dots blog instead.

Still, today I ran and now I’m blogging it.

Some time ago, I received an email about a new range of running tops. Being a blatantly brazen blagging blogger, I emailed back and said thank you for your spam email, the tops look cool. Can I have one to review on my blog please? and they say yes, of course you can. And so I was sent a lovely stripy top from Rainbow Running.

Not cheap at £35, I was also a bit perturbed to look at the label and see they’re 100% polyester. I WILL BOIL AND DIE I thought but on investigating properly the blurb I was sent like I should have done in the first place and not just been greedy and grabbing my freebie, it says they’re made with wickable Intera fabric, which rapidly transports water molecules to the surface of the fibres where they can quickly evaporate, the garments offer a cooler and more comfortable running experience.

And after trying the running top, I can say that that’s not just marketing bollocks, as it did keep me cool and dry and I didn’t get home with it sticking to me (and that’s not just because I run [or jog, as I’ve recently been told I do, as I go really slowly, bah] really slowly. Slow joggers runners sweat too, you know. And it fitted nicely and it was comfy and all that other stuff. (Yeah, ok, I’m not very good at reviews. Random stream of consciousnesses are more my thing.)

Another thing I tried out today was my new iPhone 4. I was a bit hesitant to get one as I thought it’s just a phone, isn’t it? And I don’t even use the phone. BUT I FUCKING LOVE IT. I love it. I love it. I love it. I was very scared to take it out with me as I didn’t want to put it in my back pocket with my door key but the protective covers are still on it (although they’re getting a bit manky so I think I’ll have to take them off soon – anyone recommend a case?), so I thought it’d be ok. I downloaded the Runkeeper app, although everyone says it’s shit and loaded up my phone with Audiofuel, Kate Bush and Knifeworld. Runkeeper found my location within seconds (unlike my N95 which found my location once in the two years I had it) and I wondered if it would still go when I pressed the home button and started up the music player. I didn’t really care though as I had my Garmin with me. Everything seemed to be going ok and I shoved the phone in my back pocket. Next time though, I’ll start the music off first as Runkeeper had been going for a while while I was sorting the music out and then for even longer while I put it in my pocket. What do other runners do, if you run with your phone? Can you recommend an armband that gives easy access to everything?

After all that faffing around, I start my run. I decide to go through the fields up to the road one and a half miles away and turn round and get back. BUT I’M SCUPPERED. Some flipping farmer has furrowed his field and I can’t see the path.

Bastard farmer scum. (Yeah, ok, that’s a bit harsh but I was a bit miffed.) This is what it looked like before.

See, a proper path and everything.

I can’t see where to go and it’s all muddy and lumpy and bumpy and I can’t run on it and so I walk and I’m really pissed off and I go a bit further and I can’t see where the next stile is and so when I get even more pissed off, I turn round and go back the way I came and go to the closed off road and run up there and back down again and because of all the walking I did on the PUBLIC FOOTPATH WHICH IS NO LONGER A PATH BUT JUST A LOAD OF MUD BECAUSE OF BASTARD FARMER SCUM, my miles per minute are really really slow and maybe I should be called whatever one below a jogger is (a Race for Lifer perhaps) and then I get home and look at the Runkeeper stats which, because of the time taken to run after starting it and the time taken to take it out of my pocket to stop it, is pretty much the same as my Garmin.

Stats (Runkeeper):
Distance: 3.07 miles
Time: 42:56
Pace: 13:59 m/m
Calories: 311

Garmin:
Distance: 3.05 miles
Time: 40:27
Pace: 13:16 m/m
Calories: 260

New running tops: 1
New iphones: 1
Bastard farmer scums: 1

Music:
Audiofuel
Knifeworld
Kate Bush