I think I just made a word up. ‘Uncoordination’ has got a red squiggle under it. Oh well, I don’t care.
It’s intervals day and so I get my ipod and skip forward 98 tracks and I don’t get Courtney Love this time, which is a bit of a shame, as I like a bit of Courtney, although not the skanky, lipstick-smeared, falling-out-of-taxis, please-keep-your-clothes-on-when-you’re-on-stage-you’re-over-40-now, heroin addict bit, but the cool rock chick bit and especially the shagged-Noel-Fielding bit and I land on Audiofuel and go outside and I’ve got a stitch before I’ve even got past the gate and the warm up bit starts and I can’t keep my feet to the beat no matter how hard I try to keep in time with the 1, 2, 3, 4s and as it gets to the first interval bit, a car comes and I have to get out of the way and by the time the car’s gone, I’m halfway through the interval, well, the track is anyway, I’m still standing on the side of the road and so I carry on and I get to the top of the road as the next interval comes and there’s another car coming, so I miss part of the next interval too and I think I’m not doing very well with this today and I get to the closed off road and get to the top of the intervals pyramid and I turn round and go back the way I came and as I get to the end of the closed off road and back onto the not-closed-off road a car’s coming up the road opposite and I turn round so he can see that I’ve seen him and I wait for him to go past but he doesn’t go past and I turn round again and he’s still going really slowly and I think hurry up and go past then and he’s still driving really slowly and I turn round again and I think THAT’S THREE TIMES I’VE TURNED ROUND NOW SO YOU CAN SEE THAT I’VE SEEN YOU, YOU TWAT and he eventually goes past and I feel bad for shouting at him in my head in capitals and everything, as he was only going slowly so he didn’t run me over, which is a nice thing to do really but then I don’t feel too bad as he won’t know I was shouting at him in my head in capitals and everything and probably won’t read this either and I’m trying to keep in time with the 1, 2, 3, 4s but I have no rhythm today and I’m wondering if it’s because last night I dreamt I moved to Australia for two months and I’m feeling upside-down and then the intervals finish and the cool down finishes and I run the rest of the way home with Los Campesinos singing Romance is Boring.
Distance: 2.31 miles
Pace: 11:09 m/m
Rhythms kept: 0
Dreams of moving to Australia for two months: 1