Back to the beginning

I am so unfit.  I ran the Saturday before last, just a slow three miles, and then was aching for days afterwards.  Oh dear.  I didn’t think my little 20 minutes most lunchtimes effort in the gym counted for much although it obviously did as I am turning into a bit of a bloater, even if the scales this morning did show me as 9st 3 which, although isn’t too bad, is still the wrong side of 9st for my liking.

But as I had to cancel my gym membership, due to me now being unemployed and a lady of leisure (although I’m waiting for the leisure bit to kick in,  hmm, I think I’m waiting for the lady bit too), I’m going to have to up my training on the running front and so last night I thought to myself, I’m going to go out for three miles first thing tomorrow morning, but then I remembered that I had to go to the Post Office to collect a parcel and they’re only open in the morning and also I had to go to the letting agents to give them lots of money and also needed to buy a disgusting lampshade fit for a tenant (or more to the point, a lampshade that will fit over a Fire Angel Smoke Alarm) and so I thought to myself I’ll just have to get up early and so this morning I got up at 6:50 and only waste an hour on Facebook and I wonder whether I need a long sleeve t-shirt or will a short sleeve one do and I go to the drawer where all my running and gym stuff is crammed into and I pull out what I think is my long sleeve red t-shirt but it’s my little Helly Hansen top and I think I’ll wear that, it fits nicely and at least I’ll look ok from the neck down and I wait about three years for my Garmin to get a signal and I leave the house and after a little while I want to stop and walk and I feel like I’m a beginner at running again and I look at my Garmin and it says I’ve only gone .5 of a mile and I think oh dear and a little bit later I wonder if I’ve gone a mile yet and my Garmin says I’ve gone one mile exactly and then I see a train heading towards Liverpool Street station and I think ha ha ha, I’m not on that train and I don’t have to be on that train again, hurrah, and then I think I wouldn’t be on that train anyway as I wouldn’t be leaving for another half an hour and I wonder if all the people on the platform who I used to see every day but never talked to will realise I’m not there anymore, people like Fred Perry Tattoo Neck Man; Mr & Mrs Minger; Noel Gallagher Lookalike Man; Andy from Corrie Lookalike Man; Short Black Girl and the Really Annoying Talking Woman and I wonder if they had a name for me and I think it’s probably best I don’t know and I go under the bridge and a cyclist makes me jump and I struggle up the slope really steep bit and there’s an old man with about sixteen dogs and he says morning and I say morning back and I hope he doesn’t call an ambulance as I sound like I’m about to do a Heather in Eastenders and collapse with an asthma attack and my Garmin gets to 1.44 miles and I think come on, just another mile and a half, that’s nothing and I’m going so slowly I might as well be walking and I think it may well just be another mile and a half but I think it’s going to take me three weeks to do it and I eventually get home and bloody hell, I’m knackered.

Distance: 3.01 miles
Time: 33:54
Pace: 11:16 m/m
Calories: 261
Jobs: 0
Gym memberships: 0
Foo Fighters
Faith No More


  • Oh, yes, the beginning-again after too-long slacking off is not so fun. When are you off to the countryside? Must be love if you’re going out to run with the sheep permanently.

  • Am off on Saturday, it’s not like proper countryside, there’s a train station and I’ve already made plans to go to Covent Garden next week!

  • Loving this run’s music choices! Plus well done for starting again. After 4 weeks off I didn’t do too well at all!

  • LOL – Enjoyed this read, great to here you’re back on the running horse.

    I dread to think what I’d be like if I dragged myself out for a run these days (not ran since November). Every time I think I might start again my ankle tells me otherwise. The only plus side is the pills I’m on have killed any appetite I had so I’ve not blimped.


  • Woo hoo, Joggerblogger, great to hear from you! Was thinking about you earlier, can you do any exercise? Will you be Chief Juneathoner again this year? It won’t be the same without you.

  • Do tell us poor sods who are slavishly dedicated readers, but not personal friends the whole story. I feel I’ve missed an episode (or possibly most of Series 3) somewhere. Where are you off to? And who’s going to report on the cows?

  • I think most of the run up to my imminent move was plastered all over Facebook. I’m emigrating to Kent on Saturday to look at sheep. I will leave Adele (Fit Artist) to report on the cows. Although I know where there are some cows in Kent and will take a photo and report back next week if I don’t get run over by a tractor.

  • No running as I’m and old git – and it’s a bit hard to do weights etc as my left wrist is also shot… See what happens in the future got to go back to the hospital next week. Doing some biking and walking, but it’s no fun like running. The other downside is no drinking (because of the pills) – it’s been 5 months since I’ve had one.

    Kent eh! Nice work 😀 (shot me I put a smiley on)

  • Well done for getting off Facebook and getting your arse out running, if I see you on there I’m gonna guilt and shame you into going for a run (even if you’ve already been!! 😉

  • Oh no, the responsibility of reporting on the cows is scaring me! Hmmmm, Juneathon…I didn’t do too well last year, wonder if it’s worth committing again this time…


  • Everyone has to commit to Juneathon, I’m going to be cracking the whip!

  • So as I’m a lazy git and only started running last summer, what’s involved in Juneathon then?

  • HMC, I’ll explain Juneathon in today’s blog post (yes I did another run, two days in a row, ha, get me).

  • Pingback: Everything looks like a cow | JogBlog running blog

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