Category: Cows

After a sleepless night I get up early having made a decision and not only have I made a decision but it’s a firm decision and I’ve never had one of those before but a cup of tea and a couple of emails later and once again I’m undecided.  Aarrgghh.  So I make do with a different decision and then decide to go and see the cows over the marshes and a train goes past and I don’t think that’s my train and then another train goes past and I think that train goes to Liverpool Street and I should be on that train going to work but I’m not and I’m nervous about going back tomorrow but I have to go sooner or later and I think sooner would be a good idea and it’s bright and sunny over the marshes and I remember the radio said it was going to be cloudy and thundery all day and I’m wondering how the weather people get it so wrong every single fucking day and why don’t they just look out the window to see what the weather’s like instead of spending billions of pounds on machines that clearly do not work very well at all and then I’m out of the marshes and back on the street and there’s a girl walking down the road towards me so I go to the side and then she goes to the same side and I’m thinking aarrgghh, I hate it when people do that and so I go to the other side instead of pushing her into the bushes like I should do really and then I get home and I’ve done 5k hurrah.

Stats
Distance: 3.14 miles
Time: 37:18
Pace: 11:52
Calories: 305
Cows: 6
Music
Good Charlotte
The Cure
Hot Chip
Pixies
Hard Fi
Subhumans

I get woken up by a text message at 7am and I think why the fuck is my alarm going off, I thought it was Saturday and then I’m confused and I’m thinking it is Saturday isn’t it? and I think yes it’s Saturday and I think I should go and see the cows and then come back and be a geek all day and go through my new php book and then dye my hair and then I think bollocks, I was going to do my tax return today as I’ve been putting it off since April as I do every year and it’s mid-September so I should do it now really and as my accounting system consists purely of me chucking receipts and invoices in a drawer it’s not a job I’m looking forward to and I go over the marshes and not to be outdone by joggerblogger I take a picture of today’s blue sky to prove that it’s not all pea-soupers down here.

And I go past the cows but the cows are sitting down and I can’t see them very well and I think bastard cows sitting down, they should be standing up so I can see them and then I go past the stables and a horse comes over to say hello but when I get my camera out it walks off so I follow it and it sticks its head over the fence again but when I get my camera ready to take its picture again it walks off again and I think horse, you’re really annoying, and so I go home and on the way I see this car that doesn’t have much left of it.

And then I get home and I think I could barely run 3 miles and I’m glad I don’t have to do that three and a bit more times tomorrow at the Robin Hood half and joggerblogger can run it for me by proxy but he’d better get me a decent time though.

Stats:
Distance: 3.11 miles
Time: 37.12
Pace: 11:56
Calories: 289
Cows sitting down: 6
Camera shy horses: 1
Cars with not much left of them: 1
Music:
The Like
Peter, Bjorn & John
Kaiser Chiefs
Courtney Love
The Young Knives

I have a day off today, hurrah, so do I spend it by lounging around in bed ’til lunchtime Neighbours comes on?  No, do I fuck.  I get up at 6:30am and waste some time on the internet and then go out to attempt the three mile route round the marshes and I’m thinking is it safe over the marshes this early as I see people over there when I’m on the train but that’s a bit later and I’m thinking about the female joggers who got murdered over Victoria Park and that was early in the morning I think and I think well I probably won’t get murdered but I take my personal alarm with me and I go out the door and I see my next door but one neighbour and I think eek I don’t want to talk to anybody looking like this and so I pretend to be busy putting my keys in my back pocket and go and hide round the corner and wait for my Garmin to get a signal and then my neighbour walks past and I think bollocks but she doesn’t even smile or say hello or anything and I think miserable cow but I suppose we haven’t actually spoken before which is a shame because then I could tell her how the old woman who lived in the house before her died in the house and was found by the milkman and when the house was on the market Sanjay from Eastenders knocked on my door asking about the area because he was interested in buying the house and I wondered if he wanted to get a job in the market but anyway my neighbour walks off towards the bridge and I think I’ll go on the other side of the road and run past her but then I think we’re going to be going under the bridge at the same time then and she starts running for a couple of feet and I think ooh she must be late for work, running three steps will make sure she’s on time but then she stops on the corner and I think she must be getting the bus, I wonder where she works, doesn’t everyone work in town? and I don’t know where she can be getting on the bus to because it doesn’t go very far and I wonder if she’s getting it to the tube station the lazy moo and then I decide to start running and I go up the road and two ladies of a certain age are getting into a car and they give me a funny look and I get into the marshes and there’s no one about and then I see a man in the long grass and I think why’s that man in the long grass and then I see behind him the two ladies of a certain age and I think why is that man in the long grass with two ladies of a certain age and I think ick I shouldn’t be thinking things like that and so I try and see the cows but they’re far away but I can just about see them and I can also see Canary Wharf and the Gherkin and I think yay I’ve got no work ’til Tuesday and then I get to the stables and I think that’s the same horse as last time and I think duh of course it is, it’s not like they’re going to change the horses every couple of days and I’m thinking when I get to the footbridge I can stop and walk up it because I’m knackered and I have got seriously unfit in the last few weeks and I walk over the footbridge and up to the bread factories and this time when I get to the road where I was nearly run over last time I see a van coming so I stop and he indicates and I think well at least someone knows how to indicate and I don’t get run over and I eventually get home and although it was v. slow, I did it without stopping, yay.

Stats
Miles: 2.79
Time: 32.13
Pace: 11:32
Calories: 241
Music
Peter, Bjorn & John
The Twang
Black Wire
The Cribs
Hole
Foo Fighters
Jamiroquai
The Music

Yesterday I woke up aching like I’d been out running for the first time ever but apart from a normal ache my leg wasn’t hurting so today I thought I would go and see the cows properly for the first time since they’ve been back and of course it also gave me the opportunity to play some more with my Nokia N95 and take some cow based photos.

And after I stop hassling the cows I go back the way I came and go past the stables and take a horse based photo.

And then on my way home I come across this really unhelpful sign.

And on my way through the bread factories when I’m crossing a road a man in a car decides to turn off and nearly runs me over and I say to him try fucking indicating and luckily he decides just to give me a dirty look instead of getting out of his car and beating me to a pulp and then Kate Nash starts singing Dickhead and I think ooh, spooky, last time that played on my iPod was just after being hassled by a dickhead personal trainer in the gym.

This week is going to be healthy week. This consists of only having homemade stuff. So homemade pizza, curry and wine it is then 🙂

Today’s route

Stats:
Distance: 3.08 miles
Time: 43:13
Pace: 14:01
Calories: 280
Cows: 6
Horses: lots
Dickheads trying to run me over: 1
Music:
Kate Nash
Kaiser Chiefs
The Twang
Black Wire
Calvin Harris
Hole