Category: Running

Hot sticky scenes, you know what I mean

18 comments

First I Juneathoned at around midnight by running for the last train at Stratford International (n.b. adding the word ‘International’ to a station does not make the town any more glamorous. See also Ebbsfleet and Ashford for further proof). I also Juneathoned around 1am by cycling 2.5 miles home from the station. But because I am hardcore and because last year I said to myself that this Juneathon I would run every day, I decided I’d better go for a run. I was only going to do one mile but on looking at my training schedule, it says to either do 2 miles or cross-train, so 2 miles it was to be.

Half of my brain seems to be under the impression that I can’t run without a) my Trion:Z bracelet; b) drinking a Voltz Energy Shot; and c) listening to Audiofuel. The other half of my brain tells me this is all bollocks and I can run perfectly well without any of these things. But something has made me go from a 13 minute miler to a 10-something minute miler within a few weeks and I put it all down to the above and not the fact that I’ve been doing classes and cardio at the gym three times a week for a few months now.

I do decide though that despite being slightly hungover, drinking an energy shot for two miles is a tad unnecessary but you’d have to chop my arm off to make me stop wearing my Trion:Z bracelet and I need Audiofuel to run with. I have a look in iTunes to see if there is any Audiofuel of around 22 minutes to see me through my two miles and spot the (almost) perfect track to start off this year’s Juneathon:  The Juneathon 2010 Mix. Oh yeah. (If we ask Sean really nicely, maybe he’ll do us a 2011 mix…)

Because I’m only going two miles, I wonder if I can do it in twenty minutes, i.e. a 10 minute mile pace. Then I remember that there are two sure-fire ways of getting a running injury and they are a) speed; and b) increasing mileage too quickly (ok, three then: c) getting run over by a bus) and so I decide just to take it easy but hopefully get under 11 minute miles.

Despite the rather annoying traffic lights trying to thwart my plan of under 11 minute miles, my hangover making me want to stop and walk and the heat threatening to melt me into a sticky gooey mess, I do just about scrape into the 10-somethings.

And that’s my first Juneathon 2011 done. Yay.

Stats
Distance: 2.02 miles
Time: 22:06
Pace: 10:58 m/m
Calories: 212

Adrenaline Junkie

One comment

After seeing Audiofuel Sean mention on Facebook that Adrenaline Junkie 2 would be out soon, I thought to myself ‘I don’t remember trying out the old Adrenaline Junkie’ and so I looked in iTunes and lo! Adrenaline Junkie wasn’t there. I thought to myself ‘this must be rectified immediately’ and like someone who cares about her friend’s business and livelihood should, I bought it off the Audiofuel website emailed Sean and said ‘oi, I haven’t got the old Adrenaline Junkie, can you send me a link to it please?’ and Sean being the nice guy he is, said fuck off freeloader ‘of course you can, here you go’ and so, hurrah, I had some new old Audiofuel to try out.

As if turned out, I did have most of the tracks on Adrenaline Junkie in my collection but having all the tracks run on to each other with coaching from Howie telling you how long each track will last for and at what intensity was great. (Except for the two tracks where he said I’ll be running at 190bpm when I promptly told Howie in my head to fuck right off.)

It’s just as well I don’t see many people out and about round here, as today’s sartorial decisions in all things running made me look like I’d got dressed in the dark. I had on a blue sports bra, orange and black capris, a pink top and my new blue Run Breeze socks which apparently are anti-blister and ergonomically designed and left and right-footed and breathable and moisture managed and have mid foot grip for anti-slipping.

run_breeze_socks

Whatever.

They look nice and were very comfy and didn’t give me blisters and that’s all you need to know really.

Today’s schedule called for four miles and as I got to 3.95 miles, it looked like I was going to make it in under 11 minute miles and so I ran and ran until I got to the titchy terraced house two doors away whose owners had decided to hire a digger to dig their front garden which is all of about two square feet big which meant that only the spadey bit of the digger was in their garden and the rest of the digger was taking up the whole of the pavement and so I had to stop and walk in the road around it and that is my excuse for doing over 11 minute miles.

Stats
Distance: 4.01 miles
Time: 44:24
Pace: 11:04
Calories: 422
Adrenaline Junkies I didn’t have: 1
Adrenaline Junkies nice Sean gave me: 1
Number of colours worn at once: about 8
New pairs of running socks: 1
Diggers on postage stamp sized gardens: 1
Under 11 minute average miles: 0

p.s. You can get Adrenaline Junkie at half price on the Audiofuel website by using the discount code Juneathon

p.p.s. Talking of Juneathon, don’t forget to sign up for it. Slacking is not an option

p.p.s.s. There’s still time to enter my limerick competition to win a copy of Born to Run by Christopher McDougall

Who turned the winter back on?

One comment

I decided to get some new running gear for the summer and thought I’d try out Simply Sweat as their prices seem reasonable for active wear. A lot of my first choices were out of stock (something I hope they rectify soon) but I managed to pick up two vest tops (Nike and Reebok) and a pair of Nike capri pants for about £50. I did want to pay by PayPal but each time I tried, it came up with an error message (something else I hope they rectify soon). Delivery was very quick though and the postie delivered my parcel of new running gear within 48 hours.

I was going to wear one of my new vests on today’s run but on looking out of the window and seeing horizontal rain, changed my mind and so on went the new capris with an old top.

As it was pissing down raining a bit, I decided not to go through the fields and up to the foresty bit as originally planned but to stick to pavements and so I plotted out a three mile run and set off.

I was happily speeding along gracefully and gazelle-like when I came to the road by Tesco where I had to stop for aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaages while cars went past (excuse no. 1 for going really slowly) and I got to the island in the middle of the road where I had to stop again to wait for a clear bit (excuse no. 2). I eventually get across the road and resume my graceful gazelle-likeness.

No more road-based obstacles thwart me but the wind I’m running head-first into is giving me a facelift and slowing me down (excuse no. 3) and then I get to a road and a woman driving a horse trailer turns up the road and stops and so I stop and I’m wondering if she’s going to carry on going up the road or is she reversing or what but she doesn’t know what she’s doing and I think make your fucking mind up, twatface oh good, my favourite kind of driver and she eventually decides what she’s going to do and I can continue on my run (excuse no. 4) and I go through the field where they’ve put about three million more gates (this may be a slight exaggeration) that I have to stop and open (excuse no. 5) and I go past a new stile and I didn’t think you could get new stiles, I thought they were all from olden days and I get to the top of the hill and Thru the Gears comes on and I zoom down the hill as fast as a peregrine falcon (this may be a slight exaggeration) and I go round the corner and run past the house until I get to three miles, then I turn my Garmin off and shuffle back sloth-like.

Stats
Distance: 3.00 miles
Time: 35:13
Pace: 11:45 m/m
Calories: 315
New running vests: 2
New capri pants: 1
Excuses for going really slowly: 5

p.s. Don’t forget to enter my competition to win a copy of Born to Run by Christopher McDougall (see yesterday’s post)

Thru the hardcore Pyramid

3 comments

Hal says I have to do three miles this morning. Hal also said I was supposed to have stretched and strengthened yesterday but I spent the day trawling the mean streets of Maidstone (successfully) looking for a new book club venue and then going to Pizza Express for lunch and then going (even more successfully) shopping in Ashford on the way back and then I couldn’t be bothered with all that stretching and strengthening nonsense but I decided the runs are more important than the stretching and strengthening nonsense anyway, aren’t they?

So I get up this morning and my shoulders are hurting as I must have slept funny or something and I can’t be bothered to go out for a run but I don’t want to slack off this early in my training schedule as I have got two half-marathons just two weeks apart to train for after all and then I’m on Twitter and Travelling Hopefully says she was going to do intervals and I think ooh, intervals, that’s a good idea but the Audiofuel Pyramid 180 Max interval session only takes me about two miles and so Travelling Hopefully says that sometimes when she does intervals, she rounds it up to three miles and I think, well, I can’t be outhardcored by her and so I plot a three mile route and decide to do the Pyramid followed by Thru the Gears and when I go back to Twitter to waste some more time, Lissy Runs tweets that she’s got two halfs to do but there’s only two weeks between them and she’ll have to ditch one of them and so I say

‘I must be stupid two then as I’m doing two halfs with two week’s between them’

and then I delete my tweet and correct the embarrassing ‘two’ and tweet it again, as yes, I’m that sad that I edit my tweets and then I delete it again and write it again, this time without the unnecessary apostrophe, as yes, I am that sad that I will edit twice the same tweet and then helsbels comes on to say to Lissy Runs that we’re doing two halfs with only two weeks between them and if we can do it, she can do it and I remind Lissy Runs that Juneathon participants are hardcore and then fairweatherrunner comes on and says she’s done two halfs with only two weeks between them before and she survived and Lissy Runs says ok then, she will do it, so yay for her, and then I ask Travelling Hopefully if she’s been out for a run yet and she says yes, she went at 6am and so she has definitely outhardcored me there and I force myself out the door and turn my Garmin on while I’m still walking down to the gate as then my three miles will be up sooner and I cross the road and start running and I do the interval session and I walk most of the recovery bits although not all of them and then Thru the Gears comes on and I run along to that and when I get close to three miles my Garmin tells me that I’m close to doing it in under 11 minute miles for the first time in about two years and so I don’t stop to walk across the last two roads as would be befitting for someone who usually adheres strictly to the Green Cross Code

(and not just because I’m scared that a weirdy looking man will turn up and call me Dumbo) but run across them as befitting for one of those small children who run out in between cars* in one of those scary public information films they made you watch at school**

and I do indeed manage three miles in under thirty-three minutes which is pretty cool considering that included walking breaks.

Stats
Distance: 3.02 miles
Time: 32:33
Pace: 10:46
Calories: 318
Stretches and strengthenings slacked off of: 1
Runs slacked off of: 0
Time wasted on Twitter: some
Hardcore Twitterers doing two halfs in two weeks: 3
Roads run across: 2
Miles over 11 m/m: 0
Music
Audiofuel – Pyramid 180 Max
Audiofuel – Thru the Gears

*I am not as brave as I sound. There weren’t actually any cars coming.
** I didn’t go to school in the 1940s but that’s all I could find.

Oh no, you won’t see any cars on that road…

3 comments

And so I get up the morning after having had two pints of lager and a huge vegetable burrito for lunch at the monthly tweet up and a burger, crinkle chips, baked beans, a fried egg and fried mushrooms for dinner and a can of ready-mixed vodka and apple juice and a can of ready-mixed vodka and cranberry and two glasses of the chilli vodka I made, with lemonade and a splash of lime, and a can of Budweiser and a Sainsbury’s fake Snickers bar and a packet of cheddar and onion McCoys but all this has no effect on me as I am hardcore and I need to do four miles and I decide to do it on the road, that is until I see a tweet from Dee with a photo of where she’s staying at the mo in the Cotswolds and there’s a hill and trees and stuff and it makes me want to go up hills and see trees and stuff and so I go to the Gmap Pedometer website and I plot out a four mile route that’s half fields and half on the road and I ask Shaun if the road will be quiet and he says oh yes, it’s very unlikely any cars will go past, it’s a very quiet road, and so I think ok then, I would trust you with my life, so I can trust you if you tell me the road will be quiet as obviously you wouldn’t lie to me and want me to get squished by a car would you? it’s not like I’ve got any life insurance you can cash in is it and I haven’t written a will so you’re not getting my savings or my house anyway, and so I head off on my route and I get to the gate that doesn’t open

gate

and so I climb over it and then I’m in the horse field

horse_field

but there’s no horses in it so I haven’t got any excuse for walking and then I get to the top

hill

and have to go over the stile that someone very thoughtfully has put barbed wire on the bit you put your hand on

barbed_wire

and then I’m in the toilet field and it has a nice view

view

until I get to the end of the field where someone’s dumped a toilet

toilet

and a basin

basin

and then two gypsies with a horse go past on the road the other side of the stile and one of them’s got a mullet and everything and I know I shouldn’t generalise and not all gypsies are bad (probably) but I am scared, especially as gypsies shot at Shaun once but I am at least somewhat comforted by the fact that I’m too old to be grabbed and I go over the stile and the gypsies are just standing there with their horse but they don’t shoot or grab me and then I go past the gypsy house and down the road that I have been told will be really really quiet

quietroad

and no cars will go down it and a car comes round the corner and a car comes up from the other direction and by the time I’ve got to the end of the road which is only about half a mile long, eleven cars have gone past, which isn’t exactly oh no, you won’t see any cars, don’t worry, is it? and I will be having words with a certain short-arsed-speccy-eyes when I get home and then I get to the closed off road and at the top is a pylon I’ve never noticed before

pylong

and then I get home and I tick off today’s run from my schedule and I have successfully completed a whole week’s training as I did body pump and spin on Monday, a three mile run on Tuesday, spinning and gym on Wednesday, three mile run on Thursday, body pump on Friday, four mile run today and rest day tomorrow.

hal

Stats
Distance: 4 miles
Time: long time as stopped to take photos
Pace: see above
Calories: 378
Gates that don’t open: 1
Horses in horse field: 0
Barbed wire stiles: 1
Toilets: 1
Basins: 1
Gypsies with mullets: 1
Quiet roads: 0
Short-arsed-speccy-eyes in trouble: 1
Pylons: 1
Schedules stuck to: 1

Trees, fields, life’s serene

5 comments

Hal said I had to do three miles today but I couldn’t decide whether to do three miles through the fields or on the road so I decided the only plan of action for someone as indecisive as me was to do both.

I changed all the songs on my iPod and told myself that I wouldn’t keep stopping to skip songs (the only bad thing about my new Shuffle is that it’s touch screen and goes to sleep, so if I want to skip a song, I have to unclip it from my waistband and wake it up then tap it a few times to fast forward, unlike my old Shuffle that I could skip forward without looking at it) no matter what song came on (obviously I have impeccable taste in tuneage and therefore my iPod is full of quality tracks but some songs aren’t very easy to run to) and the first song I chose to come on was Watching Birds by Stornoway and as that finished another song came on which was a bit too folky for my liking and I wanted to skip it but remembered my rule but after a while I couldn’t resist at least looking to see who it was by and so I stopped to look and it was also by Stornoway (which just goes to show that you shouldn’t buy (or illegally download) an album on the strength of a single) but I didn’t skip it and carried on going then another song came on which I thought was also Stornoway and I thought surely my no skipping rule doesn’t count if the same band comes on three times in a row? and so I stopped and I went to skip it but it’s wasn’t Stornoway, it was Pernice Brothers and I haven’t a clue who they are or how they ended up on my iPod but because it wasn’t Stornoway I left it on and then what I thought was Jesus and Mary Chain came on but then I realised it was Black Rebel Motorcycle Club and I never realised before how similar they are and then I got to the end of the fields and I decided to run up the hill to the woody bit and I thought to myself if I run up the hill without stopping I would give myself an imaginary medal when I got to the top and I ran up the hill and my lungs felt like they were bursting but I made it to the top and to prove I earned my imaginary medal here’s an image of the elevation

elevation_190511

and then I saw that someone had cut into the field what looked like The Running Bug logo and I must be being stalked by The Running Bug as I got a kohlrabi in my vegetable box a couple of weeks ago that was the dead spit of the logo

kohlrabi2

runningbug

and then I went through the woody bit and the sun was streaming through the trees and there were birds and squirrels and I wondered if I was going to turn into a black beardy man and a bluebird would land on my shoulder

but I resisted breaking into song and belting out Zip a dee doo dah and I got to the end of the woody bit and I ran down the hill to the road and then The Veronicas came on my iPod but I only like one of their songs (see above re don’t buy an album on the strength of a single) and I didn’t really want them whinging in my ears for the next three minutes but I stuck to my rule and I had to endure such inane couplets as

I don’t know where I parked my car
I don’t know who my friends are

and

I put my faith in you
What a stupid thing to do

and I wondered why people don’t write meaningful lyrics anymore, such as

Thunderbolts and lightning
Very very frightening

Me

and then I was heading back towards the house and I could see the houses in the distance and I wondered if I should go over the specified three miles and I thought yes, I will, as I am hardcore but as soon as I looked at my Garmin and it said I’d done three miles, my legs went heavy and slowed down and so I stopped my Garmin but then I felt like such a slacker as it was probably less than a quarter of a mile until I got back and so I switched my Garmin on again and I got home and there was an email offering me a media place for the Royal Parks Half Marathon. WHOOP WHOOP.

Stats
Distance: 3.21 miles
Time: 37:27
Pace: 11:40 m/m
Calories: 337
No skipping through tracks rules: 1
Bands on iPod never heard of: 1
Hills: 1
Imaginary medals: 1
Zip a dee doo dahs: 1
Meaningful lyrics: 0
Places in Royal Parks Half: 1
Whoop whoops: 1
Music
Stornoway
BRMC
Veronicas
Pernice Brothers

New shoes, and they’re pink, too

4 comments

My current running shoes – a pair of Brooks and a pair of Asics – have been giving me a blister for a while now and although they haven’t done a huge amount of mileage, they have been through a lot of mud and water and I decided that was the reason they’ve been hurting me and so I decided I needed new shoes.

Shaun also wanted to get new shoes and so, when I said that Sweatshop in Maidstone was open until 8pm, we went there yesterday evening when he got back from work.

We stood around looking gormless for a while until a young pretty girl came over and asked if we needed help and so I said I’d like some new shoes please and I told her about my Brooks and my Asics (I was wearing the Brooks as they were slightly cleaner than my Asics) and said I didn’t really want Brooks again as I only got them because the shop didn’t have any Asics and she said she’d get me some Asics to try on.

Shaun said he fancied a change from Asics and so she said she’d bring him some Nikes and she came back with a box of Asics for me and I opened the box, hoping they weren’t blue as I don’t like blue and, hooray, they were a nice pinky-purpley-cerise colour

asics_cumulus_12

and Shaun opened his box and took out THE MOST DISGUSTING SHOES IN THE WORLD EVER

nike

(they don’t look too bad in the photo but believe me, these were the ugliest shoes I’ve ever seen) and I start to laugh and feel smug as I have pretty shoes that, as well as being pretty, are as comfy as fuck, and Shaun asks the girl if she has any nicer looking shoes and she says she’ll get some Adidas for him to try but he tries the Nikes on anyway and the girl gets him to run on the treadmill and says he has a beautiful gait… but… but I can’t remember what the but was for and she said a load of other technical stuff which I’m sure Shaun will blog about and then I got on the treadmill and she said that I run with a nice neutral gait but that I have big hips and… and I can’t remember what the and was for but she said I should practice walking straight and I’m wondering if I should punch her for saying I’m wonky with a big bum but I decide not to punch her in case I get thrown out of the shop and I don’t want to get thrown out as I want to buy the nice comfy pretty Asics and then Shaun tries on the Adidas and gets on the treadmill again and he decides to buy the Adidas and while I’m waiting for him a load of people turn up for the running club they have there and on the board it says that Monday nights are for run/walk beginners but the people who have turned up don’t look like noobs as they’re all wearing proper technical vests and short shorts and proper shoes and noobs wear cotton t-shirts and tracksuits and shoes that cost £10 from the cheapy shoe shop and wear two bras at once instead of a proper sports bra, don’t they, or is that just me?

Anyway, after we’ve both finished on the treadmill and getting lots of good advice from the sales assistant, we go to pay for our new shoes and she says mine are £60, which is less than I’ve ever paid for proper running shoes. Bargain.

And so I took them out for a three mile run this morning and they were bouncy and cushiony and comfy and didn’t give me a blister. Hurrah.

Stats
Distance: 3 miles
Time: 35:21
Pace: 11:47
Calories: 315
Pairs of nice new pinky-purpley-cerise Asics: 1
Ugly pairs of Nike shoes that stayed in the shop: 1
Sales assistants telling me I’m wonky and have a big bum: 1
Noobs at the running club: 0
Blisters: 0

The Grim Greensand Beast

6 comments

Because I’m off to London tonight to meet my friends with the impeccable taste in music (i.e. the Cardiacs chatlist people), I decided to save my energy and not do Grim: Beast in the East with Shaun, Grant and Tom, but to do my own cross-country 10k here instead, taking in some of the Greensand Way.

Although Shaun kept waking me up while he was getting ready to go by coming back upstairs to inform me that a) the cat had done a poo; b) it was really smelly; c) it was also quite runny; and d) he’d covered it over with litter (you will note he hadn’t cleaned it up. When it comes to litter-tray incidents, that’s when the cat becomes *my* cat), then back upstairs again to tell me that a) he hadn’t gone yet; and b) he’d made me a cup of tea, I had a decent night’s sleep and got up reasonably early and I’d said to Shaun that I would set off for my run at 10:30, the same time Grim started but that meant I had two hours to wait and so I decided that because they’d probably finish about an hour before me, that I should get a headstart anyway and so at 9am, I decided I’d get changed and head off for my run.

At 10am, I’m still sitting in front of my computer and hadn’t even changed into my running gear and so I decided I might as well head off the same time as Grim and so I got changed and went downstairs and put on my clown shoes and went outside and waited for it to be 10:30. (Why is it when you’re sitting in front of your computer dicking around on Facebook and Twitter, time whizzes past, but when you’re looking at your watch (or in my case the clock on my ipod), waiting for three minutes to go by, it seems like it takes for ever?)

The clock eventually ticked over to 10:30 and I set off on my cross-country 10k. All was well until I got to about the fifth field and at the end of the field were some horses and I didn’t want to run towards the horses in case they got scared and gallopped towards me and trampled me to death and I was scared enough being in a field with the horses in the first place as I used to think horses were friendly until someone on Twitter said her son’s girlfriend got attacked by one and had to go to hospital and so I walked slowly past the horses with what I hoped was my I’m-friendly-and-while-I-don’t-have-any-sugar-lumps-for-you-I-mean-you-no-harm face and the horses stared at me but didn’t look particularly interested in attacking me and then I got to the next field and at the end of the field was a toilet with a wooden seat and a basin and I wondered who dumped their bathroom in this field and then I wondered if I was near the gypsies house and then I was on the road and further along there was indeed the gypsies house with their lovely classy stone lions and stuff and all their gates were open and I was scared of their dog coming out and barking at me and chasing me down the road like it did to Shaun but no dog came out and a bit further up are some woods and I got to the woods and I went round the woods which didn’t take very long and then I had to decide which way to go as I’d only done about 2.75 miles and going back the way I had came wouldn’t have got me up to 6.2 miles but I decided to go back the way I had come and try and loop some more miles in and so I went back through the bathroom field but instead of walking past the horses again I went through a different field and up through another foresty bit and then I got to the road and I wondered if going on the road when I was supposed to be doing cross-country was cheating and I decided it was and so I turned right and went over what must have been the twentieth stile so far today and back through the fields I first went through and then I went down the cycle path as, even though it’s not really cross-country, it does feel like you’re in the countryside if you look to the fields to the right and not at the housing estate on the left and then I was back on the road and I decided to go through the park to finish up as there’s water there and Grim involves water and so although I wasn’t going to jump in it, I could at least incorporate some water in my run and so I went through the park and past the pond and I got out of the park and I did 6.2 miles in a very slow time but in my defence there were about sixty stiles to go over and a field of horses to walk through.

Stats
Distance: 6.2 miles
Time: a long time
Pace: slow
Calories: 531
Grims wimped out of: 1
Cats doing smelly, runny poos: 1
Boyfriends cleaning out litter trays: 0
Hours wasted until leaving the house: 2
Stiles climbed over: about sixty
Fields of horses walked through: 1
Fields with bathrooms in: 1
Forests: 2
Ponds: 1
Music
Toyah

Three becomes six (point 3)

One comment

I don’t usually lack energy. I’m not one of these people who go round clutching cans of Red Bull (the smell… bleurgh… god knows what it tastes like… bleurgh, I would imagine) so when I got sent some energy shots that said they would give me energy for five hours, I thought, well, I don’t really need any energy but as I was going for a run this morning, I thought I might as well give it a go.

voltz_energy_shotVoltz Energy Shots come in a 60ml bottle, that don’t look dissimilar to a big bottle of amyl nitrate (or poppers or whatever name you’re more familiar with [not that I know about these things, obviously]) but instead of shoving it up your nose and taking a big sniff, you drink it.

As I’ve mentioned before, I don’t like to drink anything that contains calories unless it also contains alcohol, but these shots only contain 3 calories, so I’m not going to worry about that too much. If you’re wondering where the energy comes from if it only contains 3 calories, it comes from caffeine: it has about the amount of caffeine you’d find in a cup of coffee.

It has a pleasant berry taste and I wait for a big caffeine hit to, um, hit me, but it doesn’t. Never mind, undeterred, I head off for a three mile run.

After two miles I’m feeling energetic, whereas usually, I’d be wanting to give up by now and go home and so instead of turning off down the track and running the last mile back, I go up the side of the little park instead and up to the trail behind the houses, then up to the housing estate and then for a change I decide to go over the bridge and through the half-built housing estate and past the new shop and I get through the half-built housing estate and turn off where I think leads me to the traffic lights and the bridge and a builder man stops to let me go past his truck thing and I’m running up the road and I can’t see the oast houses and I wonder if I’m going the right way and I think I should be able to see them by now shouldn’t I? but there’s no sign of them and no sign of the traffic lights and I think oooooooooooooooooops, I’ve taken the wrong turning and added about three miles on to my run, as I don’t want to turn round and go back the way I came because a) I hate turning back; and b) I’ll have to go past the builder man again and he’ll wonder why I’ve turned back and maybe he’ll think it’s because I fancy him and then maybe he’ll offer me a bacon roll and then I’ll have to say I’m vegetarian and then he’ll think I’m weird and it will just get far too complicated and so I carry on and two miles later I get to the traffic lights I should have been at in the first place and I go over the bridge and down the road, then onto the trail and The The comes on my iPod and Matt Johnson is singing ‘pensioners get raped’ and I remember when I was a teenager I thought he was singing ‘pensioners are apes’ and I must have led a sheltered life and then I finally get home and I’ve done 6.3 miles in a not exactly fast but not exactly too shabby time considering it’s the furthest I’ve gone for a long time and maybe it was the Voltz Energy Shot or maybe it was the Trion:Z bracelet which I am now addicted to wearing or maybe it’s just because I am  hardcore.

Stats
Distance: 6.33 miles
Time: 1:19:40
Pace: 12:35m/m
Calories: 607
Energy shots looking like amyl nitrate bottles: 1
Builders who might offer me a bacon roll: 1
Pensioners who are apes: 0
Miles gone out of my way: 2
Mes being hardcore: 1
Music
The The
Hole
Toyah
Audiofuel
The Killers
The Smiths

Teacher’s pet

5 comments

As I’d run yesterday, I had a look to see what gym classes were being held today and I saw that not only was there a spin class, it was also with my favourite instructor. The only downside was that it was at 12:15 and I prefer to do classes in the morning, but I thought I’d get on with my ECA (End of Course Assignment) in the morning and then head off to the gym.

Of course, what really happened is that I spent all morning catching up on my emails (nothing exciting there), asking Facebook if I should run or bike to the gym (one for bike, one for run, one for running pushing my bike and one for, um, going to the pub; thanks Scott…) and Twitter which mostly involved welcoming back Travelling Hopefully from New York and quizzing her as to whether she ran round Central Park (yes) and did she wear her new gorgeous and perfect-for-NYC dress (no).

I packed up my running commute rucksack with all the stuff I usually take to the gym, i.e. face wipes, gym towel, toiletry bag, phone, wallet, keys, gym card, gym key, bottle full of water, then remembered I was running there, not cycling and so took out the face wipes, toiletry bag, wallet and poured the water down the sink.

Now the weight of my rucksack was light enough for this lightweight, I set off for the gym.

As I went through the industrial estate, I saw a Winnie the Pooh on the ground (I’m assuming it was ‘a’ Winnie the Pooh and not the real one)

winnie

and so I picked him up (Winnie is a boy Pooh, isn’t he?) and put him in my bag and carried on my way but then I thought oh no, what if whoever dropped him comes back to look for him and I’ve taken him away for ever and then they’re really really sad: as sad as my friends’ daughter was when she lost Mr Bear (although Mr Bear wasn’t lost for ever as Ben went out the next morning and found him happily sitting on someone’s wall) but then I think oh well, they can go to McDonald’s and get another one, can’t they?

I got to the gym and there was about 45 minutes until the class started (I underestimated just how long it would take me to run 2.5 miles; I thought there’d be a lot – if not most – of walking involved) and so I went on the rowing machine for 20 minutes, then went across to the spin bikes and did 15 minutes warm up.

I decided today that I would put more effort in, as my effort at spin isn’t hugely different to my effort at cycling on the road; the main difference being that when the spin instructor says we’re going up a hill, I don’t get off and walk. So, I went very fast on the fast bits and had my resistance high on the climbing bits and the best bit was when the instructor played this:

and spinning to that was absolutely fantastic and so much fun, but then ‘She Bangs’ by Remy Martin or whatever his name is came on, but despite that it was the best spin class ever ever ever and after the class had finished and I was in the changing room getting my bag, the instructor came in and I was a girly swot and said I really enjoyed that class, it was great and she said aah, thanks, you’re really improving; I’ve really noticed a difference and I think yay for me and then I said now I’m going to run home and she said I went for an hour and a quarter run this morning then cycled here and so I think ok, you win and then I ran home and I decided to run down the dual-carriageway which was a good choice as there were cows

cows-004

and a baby cow

calf

Yay.

Stats
Run: 5 miles
Rowing machine: 20 minutes
Spin: 45 minutes

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