City of London Race for Life 2008

After getting the sack from my new job on Friday for the spurious reason that my twat of a boss found me a bit abrupt, I later find out that his old secretary came back from her travels early and asked for her job back. Wanker. I spend Saturday drinking and sulking and decide that I’m not getting out of bed today, let alone go and run a Race for Life with 10,000 women wearing pink and walking really slowly but by the time I drag myself off to bed at 3am I decide to set my alarm anyway and see how I feel in the morning. In the morning I feel shit but I decide to do my race and, after all, Juneathon starts today and the laws of Juneathon must be upheld.

I get in the right lane this year, the lane for runners, unlike last year when I joined the walkers by mistake and I think we’ve set off but everyone’s still walking and I don’t see a start line and then we get round the corner and I see the start line so we haven’t started yet and then there’s a countdown and it takes three minutes to get across the start line so I decide my Garmin time will be my official time and by the time we’ve gone .2 of a mile, people have already started walking and I decide to push anyone walking out of my way and then I see some shops that look familiar and I realise we’re running down Cheapside and I’ve just gone past my ex-work and I think I should have brought a petrol bomb with me or something and after about 2 miles I overtake a girl who had been walking in front of me and who’d I’d already overtaken and I think how did she get there? and then I realise SHE CHEATED!! She must have crossed over the island and CHEATED and I’m pretty sure if you cheat in a charity run then you definitely go to hell and then some woman barges into me so I elbow her in the ribs and she says sorry and at last the race is over and my Garmin says it was only 2.75 miles but because I spent most of it stuck behind people walking slowly I don’t qualify for free pizza which I have been promised if I can do a sub-30 5k and I go and get my medal and my goody bag which consists of a granola bar, cranberry juice, moisturiser, face wash, deodorant and a horrible brown lipstick but at least I got a goody bag unlike Shaun, who, in his last race only got a paper cup and speaking of Shaun he’s just started a blog so he can join in Juneathon, so go and take the piss out of say hello to him here.

Goody bag

Today’s route

Stats:
Distance: 2.75 mile
Time: 32:32 minutes
Pace: 11:50
Calories: 276
New jobs: 0
Hangovers: 1
Women wearing pink and walking really slowly: 10,000
Juneathons: 1
Music:
The Mission
Sisters of Mercy
Madonna
Faith No More
The Secret Machines
The Levellers
Baby Teeth
Hole
Chumbawamba
THE 100 MILE CHALLENGE
Miles completed so far
23.46 out of 100 / 24 days left