National Give Things Away Day

As I slacked as per bloody usual at the weekend, I decided to carry the weekend’s long run over to Monday, like I did last week and I get up and decide to be brave and get on my new scales and they say I’m 9 st 8.5 and I think WHAT THE FUCK? and so I get on my old scales and they say I’m 9 st 9 and I think oooooooooooooooooooooh dear, I’d better go and do that run then and I decide to keep a food diary and record what I’m eating and drinking and I remember reading that people who have breakfast lose more weight and I haven’t been having breakfast every day since I’ve been here but I don’t usually eat before a run and so I make a banana and blueberry smoothie and decide to run past the egg house as it was quite quiet when I cycled up there last week and I get out the house and run down the hill and hope I can remember which way to go and not go the wrong way like I did last week and I don’t go the wrong way and I turn off when I’m supposed to and a woman with a dog says hello and I say hello back and then a man in a wheelchair comes past and I wonder if I should stop and walk in case he thinks I’m taking the piss because I can run and he can’t even walk and then I think he might not be a bitter and twisted wheelchair man and he might think make the most of your health and fitness while you’ve got it and I run past him and I go past a house with some cucumbers and eggs and an aubergine on a table and I wonder if they’re for people to take and leave a donation like the house I went past a couple of weeks ago but there’s no sign and I haven’t got any money on me anyway and then I go past a field full of cows and then I can see some tents or something and I think oh no, I hope they’re not gypsies as the gypsies shot at Shaun last year and I don’t want to get shot by gypsies and then The Levellers come on my iPod and I think flipping heck, crusties are everywhere and then I think are crusties the same as gypsies? and I decide they’re not, as crusties just sit around drinking Special Brew and cider or taking their dogs on strings for a walk and don’t go around shooting people and I go past the field and I don’t get shot and I go past the egg house but they still haven’t got any eggs for sale and I get to three miles and I stop and turn around and go back the way I came and I’m going to try and run four miles without stopping to walk which will be a bit of a record for me at the moment and a cyclist comes past and he’s a proper cyclist with a helmet and sunglasses and dorky clothes and everything and he gives me a big smile and a wave and says hello and I think WHAT THE FUCK? a friendly cyclist? when did they start making them? and I quickly get over my shock and say hello back and then I go past a field with two sheep in and I think why are there only two sheep in that huge field? and I wonder where the sheep at the bottom of the garden have gone and the man in the wheelchair comes past me again and he says hello and I say hello back and I think people will have to stop saying hello to me as I’m running out of oxygen and then I go past the vegetable house again and take a good look at the board but no, there’s no mention of any money and then I’m back on the pavement and I hope I turn off the right way and not go the way that makes me go back through the village as riding through the village on my pretty pink Pashley Poppy is one thing but running through the village sporting an unattractive shade of crimson is another but I don’t go the wrong way and I get to the hill and I walk/run up the hill and outside a house is a wooden cabinet thing with a sign saying free, just take it and I wonder if it’s National Give Things Away Day today and then I get home and I’ve done my six miles, and only ran/walked the final two, hurrah.

Route

Splits

Stats:
Distance: 6.12 miles
Time: 1:13:07
Calories: 633 
Woman with dogs: 1
Men in wheelchairs: 1
Houses giving away vegetables: 1
Egg houses with eggs: 0
Friendly cyclists: 1
Sheep in big field: 2
Music:
Cardiacs
Silvery
Levellers
PJ Harvey
Blur
The The