Things that annoy me (part 1)
It will be of no surprise to find out that, after I started a list of “things that annoyed me today”, on yesterday morning’s train to work, by the time I got home (via the pub) it resulted in quite a long list. So instead of listing them all at once, this is no. 1 in a series of, um, quite a lot (Shaun, stop worrying, you’re not on the list. Yet.)
Lunchtime, 1pm, in the gym
I get to the gym and there’s a sign that says “Buy a course of 10 Lucozades and save £2”. What the fuck, a course of Lucozades? Since when did Lucozade come in courses? Do we now go to the doctor and say “excuse me Mr Doctor but I have a bit of a sniffle, what would you recommend, those usual red and white capsule things you give out for everything?” And he says “oh no, that was in the olden days, these days we give out a course of Lucozade; drink 10 bottles of these and you will rot your teeth, feel like shit, support the vivisection industry and spends loads of money for no reason feel better immediately. Well, after 10 bottles anyway”. And if you’re really ill, you can get an even better deal: “Buy a course of 20 Lucozades and get £4 off”. I may have to stop going to the gym so I don’t have to see that sign anymore.
This entry is already on the first page of the Google for “lucozade vivisection” 🙂
Seems like a shitload of Lucozade, though…
Wow, I need to change jobs and be an SEO, I only posted that a couple of hours ago.
And if I don’t get a job as a SEO, I can get one as a poet. Hurrah.
Is this going to be on a sliding scale. By the time we get to number 1, or is it 10 will you be dribbling with rage? ………………….. i hope so.
How many bottles did you end up buying then? 🙂