Author: jogblog

Natural Hero Hot Ginger Muscle Rub and Cool Peppermint Muscle Spritz

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natural_hero_hot_ginger_muscle_rubA few weeks ago, I went to body pump for the first time in months. The next day, I woke up wondering who had run me over with a steamroller.

A few days after that, I was asked if I’d like to try out Natural Hero’s Hot Ginger Muscle Rub and their Cool Peppermint Muscle Spritz. WHY DIDN’T YOU ASK ME THIS A WEEK AGO WHEN I COULDN’T FLIPPING WALK?, I replied, albeit a bit more politely than that, and without the shouty capitals.

natural_hero_cool_peppermint_muscle_spritzAnyway, since receiving the muscle rub and muscle spritz, my muscles have been fine and dandy, and no, it’s not just because I haven’t been back to the gym since, thank you very much. So, I haven’t been able to try them. I have sniffed them though and mmmmm, they smell good! Much better than that stinky Deep Heat stuff.

What I also like about these products is that they are made with natural things, not chemically things and are free from ibuprofen, sprain relief and numbing agents, which means that they are highly unlikely to interact with medicinal products.

But what I mostly like about these are that they are tested on athletes, not animals.

I’m sure they work well too, and if you’d like to give them a go, they’re available from health and sports stores UK-wide, and from specialist retailers including Snow and Rock, Sweatshop, Planet Organic and Wholefoods Market.

A deal’s a deal, I suppose

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I foolishly said on Twitter yesterday that I quite fancied going for a run today. I also said that when it came to today, I probably wouldn’t fancy it anymore. @LouisaWilliams4 piped up ‘I’ll do it if you do it’ or something like that and so I thought aha! a challenge (sort of), ok then, it’s a deal.

And so, this morning, even though I had one of the worst night’s sleep ever (although worst night’s sleep ever seem to be the norm these days), I put on my running gear and went for a run. After putting on my running gear, I almost took it off again because my new running tights were so tight they were squeezing the fat out of me like liposuction or some other cosmetic procedure and they were almost like normal tights, not running tights, and I wondered if maybe I should put my jeans over the top but I took the risk of people laughing at any VPL I might have had and at least they were so tight they gave me a flat tummy (without needing a drastic cosmetic procedure) and so I went outside.

As soon as I got to the pavement there was a cyclist coming along and I thought you needn’t think I’m moving out of the way, you can get on the road, it’s hardly busy but she just kept cycling and I just kept running until she eventually stopped and stood at the side and I said thank you even though she was giving me a dirty look and I thought YOU WERE ON THE PAVEMENT, YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN ON THE ROAD WHERE CYCLISTS BELONG, SO DON’T GIVE ME ANY DIRTY LOOKS MISSY and then I carried on and after a mile I decided to walk and I went past a church and two old people were carrying flowers out and I thought oh, maybe they’re putting flowers on a grave and maybe it would be disrespectful to start running again now and so I carried on walking but then I thought huh? they were carrying the flowers away from the church and into the car so maybe they were stealing the flowers from dead people’s graves and I thought BAD OLD PEOPLE! BAD BAD BAD! and then I decided to run the last .25 of a mile back and I haven’t heard from @LouisaWilliams4 yet so I hope she’s kept to her side of the deal and hasn’t reneged on it like a friend did on Twitter a few weeks ago when they promised me a kingdom for finding some chocolate things and although I found them, I got fuck all.

Stats
Deals struck on Twitter: 1
Worst night’s sleep ever: billions
Pairs of new tight running tights: 1
Cyclists on pavements: 1
Cyclists on pavements I refused to stop for: 1
Cyclists on pavements giving me dirty looks: 1
Mes bothered about getting dirty looks: 0
Old people maybe stealing flowers from dead people: 2
Kingdoms: 0

A word on gym etiquette

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I haven’t done any exercise all week. I don’t usually do any on a Monday, but Tuesday I woke up and felt ok, but then mid-morning started feeling absolutely wiped out and I could barely keep my eyes open for the rest of the day and so in case I felt rough the next morning, I cancelled the spin class I was booked on and so on Wednesday, I didn’t do any exercise and then on Thursday, I had to stay in for a delivery of a laptop (ownership yet to be decided: mine, Shaun’s or communal) although I was pleased it was delivered on Thursday as that meant I could book myself in for my Friday morning body pump class, yay.

After being distracted by Twitter, I got to the gym with about thirty minutes to spare instead of the usual hour that I prefer and I went on the rowing machine for twenty minutes and then went to my body pump class and got in my usual position, next to the pillar and to the side of the instructor where I have a clear view of her and we were happily doing the warm up when a girl came in late and got her bench and weights and stuff and SET HERSELF UP RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME. What the—? Annoying or what? There was plenty of room at the other side of the hall and she could have gone there, but oh no, she stood right in front of me about a foot away and she was new and didn’t even know what she was doing which is fair enough, everyone’s new at one point and then I thought oh, if she’s new, she probably doesn’t realise that I’d quite like a clear view of the instructor really but that didn’t make me stop hating her inside and when we finished the warm up track, I moved my bench along so I wasn’t right behind her huge arse (I wouldn’t usually comment on someone in the gym’s weight as it’s the best place for them and I’d much rather see them in the gym than queuing up outside Greggs but this girl REALLY ANNOYED ME) and then I had a clear view again but I was worried that the other new girl behind me now couldn’t see but she seemed to have a good enough view and when we were doing our stretches I saw that the girl behind me was wearing pink Converse which were very cool but not really suitable footwear for the gym and maybe she should get herself some women’s running shoes or something.

Stats
Days exercised this week except for today: 0
Rowing machine: 20 minutes
Body pump: 45 minutes
Treadmill: 7 minutes (yeah, I know…)
Minutes I had a clear view of the instructor: about 5
Girls with huge arses setting up in front of me: 1
Girls behind me wearing pink Converse: 1

The Great Barrow Challenge

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great_barrow_challenge_poster

I’ve been trying to think of a challenge to do this year. Shaun and I have considered cycling from Cornwall to Kent (getting the train down to Cornwall, then cycling back) or climbing some more mountains with one of our Three Peaks Challenge mates but we didn’t come to any decision yet.

Then I got an email telling me about The Great Barrow Challenge. I REALLY WANT TO DO THIS.

It’s a four day challenge taking place over 19 September to 22 September and you can choose between:

Walking
Running
Cycling
Or a combination of the above (eg run one day, cycle one day)

Then you choose your distance:

Walk – 6,10,15 or the full 26.2 miles per day
Run – 6,10,15 or the full 26.2 miles per day
Cycle – 30, 60 or the full 120 miles per day

The best thing about this is you can adapt it to whatever you fancy, i.e. you can walk on two days, run the next day and cycle the next day. Or you can do a marathon a day for four days, it’s up to you. Personally, I think I’d like to run the 6 mile route one day and cycle the 30 mile route on each of the other two days and maybe walk a marathon on another day, aarrgghh, too many decisions!)

This is so cool, I really want to do this – anyone else up for it?

Giveaway: New Balance 1080 NBX Running Shoes

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Juneathon. Oh yes. Kind of bolloxed that up at the end, really. I totally blame Helen and Cassie for making me get drunk. They did Juneathon though by doing bar press-ups – Cassie did hers in my local

press up 006

and Helen did hers in a pub in Hythe.

IMG_0712

Cassie was also especially hardcore and Juneathoned by doing a Dressing Gown Dash in my dressing gown in my garden.

juneathon 009

Anyway, well done everyone who successfully (or not so successfully) completed Juneathon. As you’ve probably worn out your trainers with all that running, here’s a chance to win a new pair.

Sweatband have asked me to give away a pair of New Balance 1080 NBX Running Shoes – you can choose from either women’s

New_Balance_1080_NBX_Womens_Running_Shoes

 

or men’s.

New_Balance_1080_NBX_Mens_Running_Shoes

All you have to do to win a pair is write a Juneathon haiku and leave it in the comments box and I’ll choose the winner (or get Shaun to do it).

A haiku is a three line poem, consisting of 17 syllables in a 5-7-5 format.

Here’s an example:

A month of running
Every day for Juneathon
I am knackered now

Terms:
UK entries only
Competition closes midnight 31 July 2012

How many people did you have sex with in the B&B?

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I cycled to the gym and then I went on the rowing machine for twenty minutes and then I went on the cross-trainer for twenty minutes and Jeremy Kyle was on the television and although I was quite happy listening to a comedy podcast and didn’t plug my headphones into the television, the subtitle was ‘How many people did you have sex with in the B&B?’ and I wanted to know the answer too and then I thought oh, my mum had a B&B, I wonder if she had sex with all her guests too and I then thought na, probably not, especially not the dodgy 60-year-old one from Newcastle that had a boat and a 13 year old boy in Egypt and I never got to find out how many people the man on Jeremy Kyle had sex with in the B&B and then I went to my body pump class and then I went on the treadmill for fifteen minutes and then I cycled home and got ready to go out tonight to see Knifeworld.

Stats
Cycling: 4.5 miles
Rowing machine: 20 minutes
Cross-trainer: 20 minutes
Body pump: 45 minutes
Treadmill: 15 minutes
People man on Jeremy Kyle had sex with in the B&B: don’t know
Knifeworlds: 1

Duchesses ordering pizzas, and Dalai Lamas

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My weather widget said all day yesterday that heavy rain was forecast for most of today. MY WEATHER WIDGET IS A LYING BASTARD. I postponed lunch with a friend today because I didn’t want to get soaked on the way to the station and there hasn’t been a drop of rain all day.

So I went to the gym instead and I got there in a cycling PB of 11:53 which is fast for me as it usually takes me 17 or 18 minutes. I’ll have to try and get it down to 10 minutes.

First up was the rowing machine for twenty minutes and then I went on one of the cross-trainers that has a TV on them and Loose Women was on and so I thought I’d watch a bit of that (DON’T JUDGE ME) and Tony Parsons was on it and they introduced him as being a journalist and hanging out with the Sex Pistols and David Bowie but they missed out the bit about him being once married to Julie Burchill and then they were talking about being a gooseberry and showed this picture of Prince Charles, the Dalai Lama and Camilla

charles_dalai_camilla

and I thought why do they think she’s being left out of the conversation? They don’t know what happened just before this photo was taken. A pizza dude from Domino’s might have just stuck his head in the door and said ‘Pepperoni Passion with extra olives, Your Duchess?’ and she was just getting up to pay him while the Dalai Lama checked Prince Charles’ fingernails to make sure his hands were clean enough to be eating pizza with. 

I don’t know… people are so quick to judge.

Then I got on the treadmill for an Audiofuel Thru the Gears session (I think I’ve mentioned before how much I love this) but after a couple of minutes I couldn’t be arsed to do any more but then I thought to myself THERE IS NO CBA IN GSR OR VLM and then I thought but ha! everyone always said there was no I in TEAM when clearly there is

Who-says-theres-no-I-in-Team

and yes, I know this was doing the rounds a couple of weeks ago but it’s still bloody funny and I carried on doing Thru the Gears and then I went to cycle home and wondered if I could do another PB but my legs were aching and the wind was in front of me and so I didn’t PB but I got back in 14:26 which isn’t bad.

Stats
Lying bastard weather widgets: 1
Lunches postponed: 1
Cycling to the gym PBs: 1
Rowing machine: 20 minutes
Cross-trainer: 30 minutes
Tony Parsons on the TV: 1
Camillas ordering pizza: 1
Dalai Lamas checking Prince Charles’ fingernails: 1
Treadmill: 15 minutes
CBAs in GSRs or VLMS: 0
I’s in teams: 1

Dead mice and mouldy plums

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After being inspired by Warriorwoman’s Great Trail Challenge (the woman is mad – a half marathon in those conditions? No way), I put on my four-year-old Salomon trail shoes and headed for the fields, until I got to .3 of a mile and realised that my Salmon’s had hardened with age and were now as comfy as a brick.

I didn’t want to turn round and go back and get some other shoes so I carried on walking and walking and walking, sometimes breaking into a bit of a trot, but mostly walking and then I got to a field and saw a dead mouse on the floor but unlike the mouse in the garden that Shaun had tried to get me to come and have a look at, this one had a head and I wondered if it was just sleeping and not really dead and so I gave it a little nudge with my foot and, yep, it was dead and I wondered if next door’s cat had eaten the head off the one in the garden and maybe Shaun will find the head somewhere and try and get me to look at that too by insisting and persisting until I scream WHAT PART OF NO I DON’T WANT TO SEE A HEADLESS MOUSE DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND? and I carry on through the field and go up the road a bit to the next field which is A MASSIVE HILL and much more massive than any titchy tiny slope that Warriorwoman had to go up (this might be a bit of an exaggeration) and two labradors come bounding towards me but they look friendly and I realise that it’s only the barking dogs that scare me (and by barking I mean going ‘woof’, not ones that are three stops short of Dagenham) and their owner says sorry and I say that’s okay, I love dogs and she says it’s just as well with her two and I decide to go around the woods instead of through them and I see what I think is another dead mouse but then I’m not sure if it is a dead mouse or just a mouldy plum or damson or something and I didn’t want to nudge it with my foot as I didn’t want a bit of mouldy plum or damson on my foot (and yes I know I was prepared to have a bit of dead mouse on my foot but some people wear bits of dead cow on their feet every single day) and then I finish my run/walk and get home and for some reason I’ve got Rule Britannia in my head, but the version from Jubilee which is one of my favourite films.

Stats
Warriorwomans inspired by: 1
Pairs of trail shoes as comfy as a brick: 1
Dead mice with heads: 1
Dead mice without heads: 1
Friendly labradors bounding towards me: 1
Dead mice that might have been a mouldy plum: 1
Rule Britannias from Jubilee: 1

Big twin, little twin, swimming in the water

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I got to the gym in record time today – 13 minutes – and went on the rowing machine for twenty minutes and listened to some David Mitchell podcasts, including one about marathon running and I thought this is similar to the assignment I wrote for my non-fiction class although his podcast was funnier and why couldn’t I have heard this two months ago, then I could have stolen his jokes.

And then I get on the cross-trainer for ten minutes before my spin class begins and I can hear someone talking a few cross-trainers away and oh, what a surprise, it’s the girl who never shuts up and she looks like she’s put on a lot of weight and I need this podcast to hurry up and finish so I can put some music on and drown her out and then WOAH, she’s suddenly wearing different clothes and standing in front of the cross-trainer and she’s also lost about two stone in weight and then I realise that she hasn’t put on a lot of weight, THERE’S FLIPPING TWO OF THEM! and they both talk and talk and talk and never shut up and they even talk to themselves when there’s no one else to talk to and I wonder if they’re twins and if they talk all the time because when they were growing up they did it to take the attention away from the other one and pseudo-psychology bullshit aside, I just want them to shut the fuck up and then it’s time for my spin class and as I’m spinning I can see small twin down below in the swimming pool and I’m wondering if she’s going to talk while she’s swimming and yep, there she is, talking to someone while she’s swimming and then she’s swimming with her head under the water and I think surely she’ll shut up now and I’m looking for bubbles near her head but there aren’t any and so maybe she has shut up for however long she’s going to keep her head under the water and then my spin class finishes and I go into the changing room and big twin comes in and says apropos of nothing and to no one in particular that it smells like horses and I think is that what people say when they’ve got nothing to say? that places smell of horses? and I think if that’s the case then I’m glad I’m a taciturn kind of person.

Stats
Cycling: 4.45 miles
Rowing machine: 20 minutes
Cross-trainer: 10 minutes
Spin: 45 minutes
Big twins: 1
Little twins: 1
Twins who never shut the fuck up: 2

An unplanned run

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I hadn’t planned to go for a run today. I thought the most I would do would be a few minutes on the rowing machine but late morning, a run suddenly seemed appealing. This was probably a combination of an email from Nice Work telling me about the local races coming up (the Ashford 5k summer series is appealing, although being fit enough to run the July one in a reasonable-for-me time is unlikely), and a little voice in my head reminding me that I’ve got a place in the Great South Run in October and I’ve just paid again to carry my London Marathon ballot place over to next year.

So, I decided I’d do my usual pathetic-but-better-than-nothing 1.5 mile route but when I got to where I turn off, I decided to keep on going and I added an extra mile on to my run. Not only that, but I actually enjoyed the run – can someone remind me of this please next time I can’t be arsed?

Stats
Distance: 2.67 miles
Emails telling me about local races: 1
GSRs coming up in October: 1
London Marathons coming up next year: 1
Extra unplanned miles run: 1

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