My first piss-taker

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I was true to my word to myself and went out for 3 miles.  Almost.  But I can let myself off the .16 miles under 3 that it was.

Not that I ever have an easy run, but that was hard from start to finish.  I am absolutely knackered now, think I’ve been struck down by the mysterious sleeping disease again which is weird, as I’ve been feeling energetic today and was spurred on to run tonight by my scales which told me I’m 8 stone something for the first time in weeks.  Yay.  Fuck off 9 stone.

Went past another big yellow sign appealing for witnesses to another serious sexual assault which happened in a car in the road next to my old road.  I’ll be too scared to leave the house soon.  That’s the fourth one recently.  I’ll continue to wear my big orange personal alarm.  And maybe get a gun too.  Then I’ll be fully armed with my big orange personal alarm, a gun and my “don’t fuck with me” look.

Aah, then I had my first piss-taker, bless.  A man decided it would be funny to do arm movements, like he was running.    I feel honoured now I’ve had my first piss-taker.  Don’t suppose it’ll be the last.

Stats:
Miles: 2.84
Total time: 31:23
Average pace: 11:02 minute/mile
Average speed: 5.4mph
Max speed: 7.0mph
Total calories: 232
Weather: 57F
Music:
Graham Coxon – Spectacular
Graham Coxon – Are You Ready
Scissor Sisters – Lights
The Secret Machines – Alone, Jealous and Stoned
The Secret Machines – Faded Lines
Siouxsie and the Banshees – Peek-A-Boo

Another B&Q post

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Whilst I was having a browse through pages of some more disgruntled B&Q customers on the web (and, believe me, there’s a lot of them – why couldn’t I find any six months ago when I was looking for stuff about B&Q bathrooms and deciding whether to go with them or not?!!!), I came across this news article.

That is funny, wish I’d been there 🙂

I think this guy is particularly pissed off with them too.

B&Q bathroom installation – day 37

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Pete Hawkins the installation services manager leaves a message on my mobile at 11:27 asking me to call him to arrange a site visit.  I call him back at 11:30 and leave a message on his mobile.  He calls me back straight away and says he needs to arrange a site visit, when I am available?  I say either first thing, evenings or Saturday.  He says he doesn’t do evenings or Saturdays and he’s just about booked up until after Christmas but he could do Thursday or Friday next week.  I say, actually, I’m off next Friday, I can do then.  He says what time?  I say any time, morning would be best.  he says 10:30?  I say yes, that’s fine.  He says ok then, see you 10:30 on Thursday.  I say no, it’s Friday.  He says oh yes, sorry.  I say Friday of next week, 22nd?  He says yes.

Oh goody, I’m going to get to rant face to face to a B&Q manager on my birthday, heh heh 🙂

(I’m not actually very good at ranting either on the phone, or face to face, only in writing.  I’m actually a complete wimp.)

B&Q bathroom installation – day 36

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Feels more like day 365, yawn…

I ring Alan at the installation centre at 2:50 and say no one’s rung to say when I’m getting the end panel. He says it’s not at the store yet, he rang them at 1:30. I say oh ok, I can always go and get it from the store on Saturday, I assume it’s not that heavy? He says that’s fine, he’ll make sure it’s definitely at the store by Saturday and will let me know.

I say there’s other things the fitters can be getting on with, is it that they just don’t want to come back until I’ve got the panel? He says he believes that is the case, yes.

Lazy bastards.

But I’ve found myself a 5k to enter at the end of January and this has made me happy. Why has the thought of having to get up really early on a Saturday morning and travel for about an hour to go and run round a park in the freezing cold made me happy?

Update
Big boss lady Yvonne at the fitters leaves a voicemail on my mobile at 6:30 while I’m at the gym. She says they did some work in my bathroom on behalf of B&Q and has noticed I haven’t returned the completion note. She carries on to say that if there is still work outstanding, then I can tick box B and write down what is left to be done, but if all work has been done, then tick box A and send it back. She says she’d really appreciate it if I could either tick box A or B and send it back to her.

Fuck off you dozy bitch. You don’t even know if your fitters have finished the job? Why not ask them, or if they’re too stupid (as I imagine they are) to know if a half-finished bathroom is finished or not, then ask the B&Q installation service centre who can tell you that it is not finished. And as for appreciating it if I’d send the completion notice back, well, I would have appreciated it if you had turned up on 9 October to start work like you were supposed to and finished it that same week; not start work three weeks later and, even then, seven weeks down the line it’s still not finished. And not only would I appreciate it if your fitters didn’t throw the pipes out of the window into my back garden and leave them there where they still reside, I would also appreciate it if your fitters didn’t leave my window wide open twice, didn’t leave my keys in the gas meter box, didn’t rip my kitchen floor, turned up on time (and that’s when they even bothered turning up) and didn’t leave me notes that I can’t do anything about when I get home late but instead call me and let me know if there’s a problem.

I think you know where you can stuff your completion notice, don’t you?

Aah, I feel better now 🙂

Stupid cow.

Healthy Tuesday

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Woo, get me, I went to an Italian restaurant for lunch today and didn’t have pizza. I didn’t even have the penne with roasted aubergines, olives and mozzarella that sounded very nice. No, I had a nice healthy, low fat spaghetti and tomato sauce and very nice it was too. My next pizza is going to be a week tomorrow. Just for your information and in case you were getting worried about my low pizza intake.

Anyway, to continue on with my healthy day and after being struck down by a mysterious sleeping illness yesterday afternoon which meant I didn’t get to the gym after work like I’d planned to and was asleep at 9pm, I chanted (in my head, I don’t go round talking to myself. Not very often, anyway) “go for a run you lazy bitch” all the way home and by the time I got home I was looking forward to it, plus Tuesday is my traditional go for a run day, apart from last Tuesday which was go to see a play about a runner day, so out the door I went. Walked two feet and thought, shit, I’m knackered, I want to go home.

But I carried on on a pretty uneventful run, with just thoughts about how it’s not a good idea to be a prostitute in Ipswich at the moment and, anyway, I’m glad I’m not a prostitute because I can’t walk in heels so I’ll stick to my day job and continue wearing my Converse (all six pairs of them, not at the same time though, obviously).

B&Q bathroom installation update
No update today. No one rang to say when Donald’s bringing over the panel and no one rang to say when the installation manager’s coming to look at my kitchen floor.

Stats:
Miles: 2.08
Total time: 22:10
Average pace: 10:40 minute/mile
Average speed: 5.6mph
Max speed: 7.1mph
Total calories: 190
Weather: 51F
Music:
Eminem – Hustlers and Hardcore
Courtney Love – All The Drugs
The Beta Band – Broke
Ween – The Argus

B&Q bathroom installation – day 34

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Hurrah, my mate Alan at the installation centre is back from wherever it is people at B&Q go on holiday (Homebase probably) and rings me at 10.45.  He says he’s just going through the notes and is ringing to see what’s outstanding as he last spoke to me at the end of November.

I say I’m waiting for the bath panel.  I say it’s coming by Parcel Force and they tried to deliver last Monday but I wasn’t in and they left a card to say they’d try again Tuesday or Thursday, I couldn’t quite read it, but they haven’t as they haven’t left a card or anything and I did speak to someone at the installation centre last week but I don’t know his name and he said he couldn’t arrange another delivery until that delivery had failed and you had the panel back.  Alan says that’s right.

He says what else is outstanding?  I say the floor needs finishing as the designer didn’t measure properly and I had to buy more floor, also the ceiling light needs replacing.  And the toilet needs screwing down or something as since the floor was put down, it moves and squeaks.

Alan says what’s this about your kitchen floor being torn?  I say yes, they ripped my kitchen floor.  He says have the fitters done anything about it?  I say no, they haven’t said anything.  I say Jackie said she was going to speak to your compensation team about replacing it.  Alan says I don’t know anything about that as I’ve been off, and now Jackie’s off.

He says he’ll see what he can do about the bath panel.  I say it has to be a before 9am delivery, as I can’t take any time off.  My boss won’t let me have any more time off as I’ve taken off too much already.  Alan says, hmm, how about a Saturday delivery?  I say yes, Saturday’s fine.  He says he’ll see what he can do.

The designer first came round at the end of July.  Five months later…

Update
Alan rings back at 11:50 and says the panel is going back to the store and I can either pick it up from there or they can deliver it.  I say can they deliver it on Saturday?  He says they don’t deliver on Saturdays but the guy who works there who lives near me can drop it round on his way to work or from work.  I say that’s fine but I don’t think he starts work ’til 10 and I leave at 8:30.  Alan says well he’ll probably drop it off on his way home then.  I say what time, as I don’t get in ’til about 6:30, will he ring first?  He says he’ll make sure he definitely rings first and it will probably be Wednesday or Thursday.

Alan says, about your floor, the compensation team need to claim back the money from the fitters so I have to send the installation manager round to have a look.  I say that’s fine.  He says you can discuss anything else about the installation with him but obviously the floor’s the main concern.  He says he’ll ring me to arrange a time for him to come round.

I’m bored of my bathroom now.

Songs of Praise

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I couldn’t think of any 80s children’s programmes that were shown on a Sunday and the only Sunday programme I could think of was Songs of Praise. Not that I used to watch it, you understand, but my brother was on it many many years ago singing in the choir. Ha ha, he had a choir dress on, or whatever you call them. V. funny.

Anyway, I couldn’t be bothered to go to the gym, so I went for a run instead. Along with continuing the 80s children’s programmes theme, I seem to be continuing the totally feeble theme. 1.5 miles, and I stopped three times. Yikes! But obviously it was v. important that I took a pic of this blackbird.

Next week I’m going to unfeeble myself.

I think it’s been a couple of days since I moaned about B and bloody Q so here’s a little rant.

Can someone tell me why I have to live with these two big boxes in my living room

just to get these four parts out of them?

Mad! I bet someone at B&Q thought they were being really clever thinking of that: “Hmm, the parts are from China, it’ll take ages getting them over here. Ooh, I know, we’ll send her a whole new sink and the fitters can take the parts out of that and then return the rest of the sink. That will be much easier than us taking the parts out of a sink we have here and posting them. I’m so clever, I think I’m going to ask for a promotion. Today teaboy, tomorrow CEO, yah!”

Twats.

Stats:
Miles: 1.51
Total time: 17:06
Average pace: 11:17 minute/mile
Average speed: 5.3mph
Max speed: 7.3mph
Total calories: 149
Weather: 51F
Birds sitting on fences: 1
Big boxes in my front room: 2
Music:
Eminem – Kill You
Courtney Love – All The Drugs
The Beta Band – Broke

Swap Shop

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Continuing the 80s children’s TV shows theme, this Saturday morning I swapped my bed for a run, although not as early as I was hoping I was going to wake up. My Garmin sprang into action this morning in the time it took me to think “I wish those bastards would stop chucking rubbish into my garden” and so off I went and bloody hell it was cold and windy, I almost gave up by the time I got to the bridge, but that would have been incredibly feeble – even for me – as it’s only about 20 yards down the road.

Thought going back for my parka and gloves wasn’t going to help my running so I carried on and decided to brave the marshes and took my camera with me, which was just as well, as I was a complete wimp today and did a lot of walking in between running a bit. The first photo opportunity was in the form of these birdies:

Then I stopped again a few yards down the road to take a pic of this sculpture, don’t know what it is, and can’t remember what it said. I’ll take a better look next time.

And here’s the Coppermill, it’s 200 years old. If you’re very bored, you can find out more about it here.

And just as I’m getting near the bridge where the girl was attacked, just to make me even more scared, there’s a big yellow sign there appealing for witnesses.

Should have worn my heart monitor today, would have found out my max rate at the speed I went through the bridge at that point.

Still, through the bridge and we get to a nice bit of scenery on the right.

Shame the view on the left’s not so pretty.

But then, hurrah, here are the cows. I like cows. It’s a shame there’s no penguins over the marshes as I like penguins even more than I like cows. Still, it’s probably best that I don’t get too excited, so maybe it’s for the best that there aren’t any penguins over there. Shame though.

And here’s the cow that’s always on its own. I want to know why it’s always on its own. Is it just a miserable old git, or did it piss off the other cows?

Here are the cows playing stare outs.

My legs aren’t this long, honest.

Then I got up to the horses.

And then chickened out and went back on to the road, therefore saving me going over the scary footbridge here

There you go. That’s how to train. Stop every few yards to take pictures of nothing in particular.

I promise to go running more next week. I didn’t go this week but in my defence, on Tuesday I went to see this play so at least it was about running, which is almost the same as doing it, right?

Stats:
Miles: 3.62
Total time: 48:03
Average pace: 13:17 minute/mile
Average speed: 4.5mph
Max speed: 8.6mph
Total calories: 387
Weather: 50F
Birdies: Lots
Sculptures: 1
Coppermills: 1
Signs appealing for witnesses: 1
Cows: 4
Horses: 2
Music:
Sultans of Ping – Psychopath
PJ Harvey – Teclo
OST 8 Mile – Battle
Hot Chip – Down With Prince
Half Man Half Biscuit – Bottleneck at Capel Curig
The Fall – The Knight, The Devil and Death
Daisy Chainsaw – Room Eleven
Cardiacs – All Spectacular
Blondie – Heart of Glass
Babyshambles – Fuck Forever
The Au Pairs – Come Again

B&Q bathroom installation – day 33

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It’s all very quiet on the B&Q bathroom installation front. Will have to kick some B&Q butt next week I think.

In the meantime though, it’s Friday, it’s five to five and you know what that means, don’t you? No, all you over 30 year olds, it doesn’t mean it’s Crackerjack, it means it’s BEER O’CLOCK, yah!!

I’m having pizza too 🙂

But I promise to go for a run in the morning, honest. Jogblog will be back.

(p.s. It’s not really five to five, it’s actually 6:18, but that wasn’t as catchy, nor was it the catchphrase of an 80s children’s TV show involving cabbages)

B&Q bathroom installation – day 32

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So now Parcel Force are lying to me too. The card I got on Monday definitely said they would try to deliver again on Tuesday or Thursday (there aren’t any other days beginning with a “T” that I’ve forgotten about, are there? I couldn’t really make out for sure what day it said but it definitely began with a “T”. Maybe it’s a special Parcel Force alphabet) but there was no card on Tuesday to say they’d called, and there was no card today, so where’s my bath panel?

They’re all in cahoots to piss me off 🙁

I don’t think I’ve said “cahoots” before though, I like it, I’m going to say it more often 🙂

Update
Thought I’d post some pics of what’s left to do. Even though I’m waiting for the end panel, why can’t they come round to finish off the sink, the floor and replace the ceiling light that they’ve left dangling? And get rid of the pipes they’ve left out in the garden. This is week six, it’s going to be going into week seven, ’tis not good.

Twats. I might ring them tomorrow, they’ve got complacent since I stopped ringing them every two minutes but I was getting fed up with being project manager, and at least I can actually have a bath now.

Update #2
Someone visited the site by searching for “should i pay up front for an bathroom installation”.  Ha ha, I reckon he/she has got their answer now!  🙂

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