Category: Jogging

Continuing the 80s children’s TV shows theme, this Saturday morning I swapped my bed for a run, although not as early as I was hoping I was going to wake up. My Garmin sprang into action this morning in the time it took me to think “I wish those bastards would stop chucking rubbish into my garden” and so off I went and bloody hell it was cold and windy, I almost gave up by the time I got to the bridge, but that would have been incredibly feeble – even for me – as it’s only about 20 yards down the road.

Thought going back for my parka and gloves wasn’t going to help my running so I carried on and decided to brave the marshes and took my camera with me, which was just as well, as I was a complete wimp today and did a lot of walking in between running a bit. The first photo opportunity was in the form of these birdies:

Then I stopped again a few yards down the road to take a pic of this sculpture, don’t know what it is, and can’t remember what it said. I’ll take a better look next time.

And here’s the Coppermill, it’s 200 years old. If you’re very bored, you can find out more about it here.

And just as I’m getting near the bridge where the girl was attacked, just to make me even more scared, there’s a big yellow sign there appealing for witnesses.

Should have worn my heart monitor today, would have found out my max rate at the speed I went through the bridge at that point.

Still, through the bridge and we get to a nice bit of scenery on the right.

Shame the view on the left’s not so pretty.

But then, hurrah, here are the cows. I like cows. It’s a shame there’s no penguins over the marshes as I like penguins even more than I like cows. Still, it’s probably best that I don’t get too excited, so maybe it’s for the best that there aren’t any penguins over there. Shame though.

And here’s the cow that’s always on its own. I want to know why it’s always on its own. Is it just a miserable old git, or did it piss off the other cows?

Here are the cows playing stare outs.

My legs aren’t this long, honest.

Then I got up to the horses.

And then chickened out and went back on to the road, therefore saving me going over the scary footbridge here

There you go. That’s how to train. Stop every few yards to take pictures of nothing in particular.

I promise to go running more next week. I didn’t go this week but in my defence, on Tuesday I went to see this play so at least it was about running, which is almost the same as doing it, right?

Stats:
Miles: 3.62
Total time: 48:03
Average pace: 13:17 minute/mile
Average speed: 4.5mph
Max speed: 8.6mph
Total calories: 387
Weather: 50F
Birdies: Lots
Sculptures: 1
Coppermills: 1
Signs appealing for witnesses: 1
Cows: 4
Horses: 2
Music:
Sultans of Ping – Psychopath
PJ Harvey – Teclo
OST 8 Mile – Battle
Hot Chip – Down With Prince
Half Man Half Biscuit – Bottleneck at Capel Curig
The Fall – The Knight, The Devil and Death
Daisy Chainsaw – Room Eleven
Cardiacs – All Spectacular
Blondie – Heart of Glass
Babyshambles – Fuck Forever
The Au Pairs – Come Again

In keeping with this week’s finely tuned athlete stylee type behaviour (yeah ok, it’s only Wednesday), I went out for another run tonight and four people stopped to let me go past them.  Either I was looking like a serious athlete; they thought I was too fat to get past them; they’d seen me steamroller into the contents of the mosque that spilled out onto the pavement the other week; or they were just polite people.  More considerate than the two cyclists on the pavement that nearly rode into me.  People cycling on the pavement should be shot.  You might think that’s a bit harsh, but I disagree.  If not shot, then cut their feet off so they can’t reach the pedals.

Now I am off to continue my week of being a finely tuned athlete and open the bottle of wine that’s in the fridge while I make my dinner of roasted peppers with mushroom couscous, yum.

Stats:
Miles: 2.63
Total time: 28:17
Average pace: 10:45 minute/mile
Average speed: 5.5mph
Max speed: 6.8mph
Total calories: 244
Weather: 57F
Considerate people letting me go past: 4
Inconsiderate cyclists on the pavement: 2

Woo, get me, up and out at 8am on a Sunday morning. I decided not to open the second bottle of wine that had somehow made its way into my fridge last night and went to bed and watched I’m a Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here instead, which I think makes me officially sad. Or at least makes me officially old, as I am officially in my late 30s next month (22 December for anyone who’s interested/wants to send me presents/cards/alcohol/hard cash/proposals of marriage, etc.). Eek. Although Gary reckons 36 is late 30s but I disagree.

Anyway, I dragged my nearly officially late 30s body out the door into the cold November air. But look how pretty the trees are in the park:

But I didn’t go to the park, I went to the marshes.  I took a different route this morning and went under the bridge where Ben came off his bike and broke his jaw and up to the marina.  Here are some boats in the fog.

Aw, wish I lived on a boat.  That would be cool.

And although I missed seeing the cows today, there were a lot of swans, bloody millions of them, but here’s a pic of two:

And here’s another birdy type animal, talking to a couple of pigeons:

It was a really nice run and a route I’d only ever taken once before when me, Ben, Sheila and Eleanor walked back after Ben’s birthday one Sunday lunchtime a few years ago.  That was Sheila’s idea which I didn’t think much of at the time.  Walking?  Miles?  On a Sunday?  With a hangover?  Are you mad?  Ben didn’t think much of the idea either and the walk was only made marginally more interesting by the wreaths tied to the railings we walked past and we could play the “guess how they were murdered” game.

But then my route took me back up to the road and my scenic route turned into this:

Hmm, not as pretty as the river.  Almost though, eh?

Stats:
Miles: 4.28
Total time: 50:05
Average pace: 11:43 minute/mile
Average speed: 5.1mph
Max speed: 6.6mph
Total calories: 385
Weather: 51F
Boats: lots
Swans: even more lots
Cows: 0
Music:
X-Ray Spex – Warrior in Woolworths
X-Ray Spex – Germfree Adolescents
Toyah – The Druids
The Smiths – The Boy With The Thorn In His Side
Pulp – Something Changed
Northern Uproar – Town
New Model Army – Poison Street
Ludes – Spanish Guitar
Kula Shaker – Light Of The Day
Half Man Half Biscuit – Yipps (My Baby Got The)
Franz Ferdinand – Words So Leisured
Cribs – The Wrong Way To Be
Citizen Fish – Internal Release

Did another run/walk to the gym this morning. I thought if I packed less in my rucksack then it would be easier but it was worse, it was bouncing up and down and I had to hold the straps to be able to run with it. Fitness First need to make rucksacks with waist straps, or maybe I’ll go to the runner’s shop and buy one. Yeah yeah, any excuse to go and buy new running stuff. But I need one, right?

Can I sue B&Q for ruining my running routine? A routine which, admittedly, consists largely of a phrase containing the words “I”, “bothered”, “be” and “can” but still, I’d be out running more if I could come home and have a shower and wash my hair afterwards, instead of having to go to the gym like a dirty tramp using public facilities.

But I did do gym type things when I was there this morning, including a mind numbingly boring 10 minutes on the treadmill which was about as exciting as waiting for a plumber from B&Q to turn up although it did turn into a 13 minute run as, just as I was about to head for the shower Graham Coxon started singing You & I, so I did another three minutes. I’m glad Mr Coxon sticks to the good old fashioned standard three minute pop song as had Cardiacs started to play Dirty Boy, I’d have been stuck on there for another nine minutes.

When Cardiacs starting playing Dirty Boy last Friday at the gig, I said to Gary this song goes on for nine minutes. He just grinned and said and why not? Which is a good response. If I’d had said that to Mr Negativity who was also at the gig, he’d have said oh no, I’ve got to listen to this for nine minutes? Although to be fair although he said he wasn’t now a fan, he did admit it was a good night out. And he did offer to do the bar run while I was busy jumping up and down and trying to restrain myself from throwing the drug addled lunatic woman over the balcony.

Stats:
Miles: 2.04
Total time: 29:06
Average pace: 14:16 minute/mile
Average speed: 4.2mph
Max speed: 6.7mph
Total calories: 142
Weather: 53F

My Garmin didn’t want to pick up a signal in the back garden, so I sat at the bus stop at the back of my house and tried it there. While I was waiting there was a young boy across the road throwing a ball against a wall. My back wall. As my Garmin had eventually decided to pick up a signal, I decided to let him live and went on my way.

As I was approaching the mosque the doors opened and out spilled dozens of people. I decided it would be fun if I didn’t stop or slow down and to see how many I could knock down by running through them. Unfortunately they mostly got out of my way, shame. Next time I’ll run faster.

Still, I managed to let off some steam and forget about the B&Q fuckwits for a while. Now it’s time for my dinner and a hot bath. Oh well, one out of two’s not bad I suppose.

Heart rate monitor training will resume on Saturday when I go to the park and run round it as fast as I can for 3 minutes or until I want to puke (as Julie has advised.  The book  didn’t mention anything about running ’til I puke (funny that) but I’ll take her word for it) to find out my maximum heart rate. Although, I could probably just monitor it the next time I speak to B&Q, that would probably work just as well.

Stats:
Miles: 2.71
Total time: 29:02
Average pace: 10:41 minute/mile
Average speed: 5.6mph
Max speed: 10:00mph
Total calories: 239
Weather: 59F
Young boys throwing balls against my house: 1
People I successfully knocked down outside a mosque: 0
Music:
Baby Teeth – Rock The Boat
Manic Street Preachers – Love’s Sweet Exile
Scissor Sisters – Tits On The Radio
Seahorses – Round The Universe
Soft Cell – Persuasion
The Au Pairs – Unfinished Business

As I’ve now done my 10k training plan and needed a new plan, here’s what I’m doing now: Heart Monitor Training For The Compleat Idiot (although the part of me that despises companies/marketers trying to be *ahem* “wacky” with their oh so not funny at all misspellings in their vain attempt at humour put me off but it did get good reviews and if it really starts to bug me I can Tippex it out and write it in, proper spelling and everything).

So off I went with my heart rate monitor strapped on and my new iPod Shuffle (you have no idea how small this is. Well, okay, you will have an idea (or even know exactly) how small it is if a) you have one; b) you’ve seen one; or c) you know the dimensions of it (which you will if you were one of the lucky people I emailed to say it was only 4cm x 2.5cm)). The plan says to stay below my recovery rate even if it means walking. It meant a lot of walking. I set my Garmin to beep at me if I went over the recovery rate and it was trilling like a budgie every couple of minutes or so, so I got home feeling like I’d had a little walk round the field and nothing more. Which, of course, is exactly what I had done.

Next I have to find out my maximum heart rate which entails running up and down a hill. Hmm, there are no hills here, damn. Where am I going to find a hill?

Stats:
Miles: 1.34
Total time: 17:29
Average pace: 13:03 minute/mile
Average speed: 4.6mph
Max speed: 6.5mph
Total calories: 128
Average heart rate: 147
Maximum heart rate: 161
Weather: 53F
Hills: 0
Music:
Baby Teeth – Rock The Boat
Boomtown Rats – Banana Republic
Strontium 90 – Electron Romance